Kelly Carámbula -Photos and Interview

Mother Stories

At Home With San Francisco Artist and Mama Kelly Carámbula

Written by Erin Feher

Photography by

Apr 30, 2019

Artist Kelly Carámbula is the first to admit it’s not easy. From navigating the unpredictable waters of raising a child with special needs, to carving out the mental and physical space to create art while raising two high-energy, mama-needing little girls, Kelly’s parenthood journey has required constant improvisation, and sometimes facing the darkest moments before moving into the light. But what makes her so inspiring is the way she does it—with honesty, intention, and and an inborn sense of style that makes every space she inhabits reminiscent of one of her sculptures: colorful, graphic, whimsical, and a little bit unexpected. Kelly invites us into her incredible Bernal Height home—that she personally renovated down to the doorknob details, obviously—and talks candidly about the joys and challenges of motherhood, and surfacing from the initial plunge of new parenthood to rediscover her creativity. Click through the full tour below and prepare to be inspired!

: "We searched for a house nearly every weekend for over a year. When we found this house, we couldn’t believe it, because it met all of our requirements and it was built in one of our favorite architectural time periods, the 1960s. We’ve lived here for a little over two years."

: "We call our style 'happy modern.' I love color, art that has meaning to us as a family, and plants—they bring me real joy. I’m drawn to simple lines and quirky little details."

: "First, I have to love something to hang it on our wall. I think we are so overloaded with information and images these days—I am very intentional about what I want to look at. There are times that I think our walls look a bit blank, but I don’t want to put something up just for the sake of it, so when I find the right piece, I know."

: "Yes. What started out as a kitchen and bathroom renovation turned into a complete down-to-the-studs renovation. I think it took some years off my life, but there is a real satisfaction knowing that every detail of this house was thought about."

: "I love the bookshelf in our living room—we found it in S.F. shortly after moving here and I drove a hard bargain that my husband still talks about with pride. In fact, we love it so much that we based the design of our kitchen around it. I also love the yellow George Nelson dresser in Quinn’s room. I found it at a flea market in Brooklyn and immediately scooped it up. I love the pop of color and those quirky handles Lastly, when we renovated our kitchen we asked our neighbor Josh Duthie to make us a collection of wonderful, colorful, counter height chairs. They make me happy every day."

: "Nearly every room is a playroom. We actually have a playroom, but our kids tend to stick to their own rooms or the living room. I do try to at least keep the toys organized in their own places because the chaos of toys drives me a little wild."

: The best mug collection.

: "Yes, I always wanted to be a mother and specifically the mother of two children."
Kelly wears a Gravel & Gold dress and Bryr clogs.

: "Claire is six and Quinn is three—their birthdays are three years and six days apart. Claire is really into reading, emojis, and making sandwiches—she’s really great at creating interesting combinations! She loves going through people’s bags, for better or worse. Quinn is a total hoot right now—she’s loves singing, dancing, going to the playground, and climbing as high as she possibly can. She can occupy herself with her babies for a very long time and loves collecting random things—rocks, hair ties, pretend food, etc.—then tucking them under her pillow at night."

: "I love seeing my children’s curiosities and inhibitions. It’s such an incredible opportunity to see these little beings unfold and be a part of who they are."

: "We didn’t know what we were having with our first child—I felt fairly certain we were having a boy—and we found out with our second. I’m beyond thrilled to have two girls. I grew up as an only child living with my single mother, so I feel more at ease raising girls. I want to raise them to be strong, powerful, outspoken women who know they can take on anything they set their minds to."

: "We named our oldest daughter Claire Beatrice after my grandmother, Claribell, who went by CB for most of her life. She was an incredibly strong woman who shared compassion with everyone she met, but also wasn’t afraid to tell you the truth. She called me darlin’, was quick to give me a good squeeze, learned to drive in her 70s, and drank a glass of Jim Beam every night and lived to be 95. My middle name is also Claire and I love having that shared thread between us. Our youngest daughter is Quinn Elyse. We loved that it was simple and strong, and it means 'wise.' All the woman in our small family start with the ‘k’ sound, but I like that we all have our own initials, CC, QC, KC. We chose Elyse because we liked the way it sounded with Quinn and as a nod to my husband’s grandmother, Eleanor—they both shared the El."

: "My first pregnancy was glorious. I loved being pregnant and feeling the baby grow inside my belly—what a crazy experience! We moved from Brooklyn to San Francisco when I was seven months pregnant, but even that didn’t really phase me. I was excited for a new adventure. My second pregnancy was quite different. Since Claire was diagnosed with a genetic disorder, we had to go through all sorts of extra testing and I felt pretty overwhelmed by all of it. There were a few scares with abnormalities that turned out to be nothing, but were stressful. Quinn was also so much more active than Claire, I remember just sitting and watching my belly move in these absurd ways and feeling in awe and wondering who this little girl was going to be."

: "At the time I had Claire, I was running a small magazine, Remedy Quarterly, that I published, designed, and managed on my own. My plan was to take one issue off, then get back at it. But then, when Claire was five weeks old, our life took a different turn that changed everything."

: "Claire has a genetic disorder called Smith-Magenis Syndrome. If you look it up, it’s terrifying. People with SMS have global developmental delays, exhibit self-harm, and their melatonin/sleep cycles are often switched, so they tend to be awake at night and thus sleepy during the day. I have a lot of trauma around even speaking about it, but I know that talking about it and being open about it is good for me and our family."

: "When Claire was five weeks old, we took her in for a check up. The doctor noticed an unusual rhythm when she listened to her heart, so she sent us to the ER. At this point we were concerned, but didn’t expect anything crazy—it was the end of the day and we thought a trip to the ER would just be a second opinion and reassurance that it was just a fluke. That all quickly changed, and before we knew it, doctors were rushing around and we were told that Claire would need to go to Stanford Children’s hospital for emergency open heart surgery. Doctors were sticking needles in my baby and telling us that her heart was abnormal. It was horrifying and I felt like I was in my worst nightmare. We hysterically called our families and told them what was going on. My husband’s parents flew out right away and we rode by ambulance to Palo Alto. Luckily, Claire didn’t need emergency surgery, but that was the beginning of a 55-day stay in the CVICU where Claire was touch-and-go for a long time. She underwent three surgeries, including open heart surgery. My husband Aaron and I lived out of a suitcase and slept where ever we could as long as it was near Claire. When we were finally released from the hospital, the doctors suggested we get a genetic test, but I couldn’t. I just wanted to love on my baby without doctors and tests and anything looming over us. So, I waited a year and a half, when she was happy and stable and we’d had a lot of time to bond. I honestly thought we were just dealing with a heart condition that we could manage and that would be it."

: "We had blood drawn for the genetic test a few months before Claire’s second birthday. I remember when we got a call from Stanford saying that they had some news that they needed to share with us and that we should both be on the phone for it. Aaron took the call from work and I sat in our bedroom as a genetic counselor gave us the devastating news that Claire had a disorder called Smith-Magenis and it sounded horrifying. It wouldn’t be easy they said. I went into shock. I cried throughout the next few days and nights and grieved for the child I wouldn’t have. I was angry. I honestly still can’t speak about my greatest fears. I have a hard time thinking about the future, so I focus on the present. I try to support Claire any and every way I can. We have to take it one day at a time—and she’s made so much progress. She is incredible—but small things that just 'happen' for most kids take so much effort with Claire. Walking, talking, eating with utensils—when they all finally happened, we really appreciated them and celebrated her accomplishments. She is amazing and it’s a privilege to be able to witness how much effort it takes and how special it is when it finally happens."

: "It’s been a rollercoaster, to be honest. Ever since Claire was discharged from her stay in the CVICU, she’s been in some sort of therapy: physical, occupational, speech. I threw myself into doing everything I possibly could to help her. I felt like I alone was the one who could help her, and no one else could do what I do, and along the way, I lost myself. I became overwhelmed and resentful, which is a hard thing to admit. But it wasn’t until I finally gave in and asked for help, that things steadied. I worked really hard to get support for both Claire and our family. Now that I’m not doing everything, I feel like I can be a better mother to Claire."

: "It’s taught me that parenthood is full of surprises, to celebrate even the smallest accomplishments, and that taking care of myself is just as important as taking care of my family. She is the bravest person I know—and she motivates me to keep moving forward, to not take things for granted."

: A sculpture by artist and friend Leif Low-Beer.

: "It’s taken me a long time to build up an adequate support system. My husband and I are both from the midwest and our families still live there, so we don’t have any family nearby. When I hit a real low a few years ago, my therapist encouraged me to dream big and get more support than I thought I needed. It’s only in the last year that I feel like I’ve been able to do that. Through one of Claire’s therapists, I found out about applied behavior analysis (ABA) and it’s been amazing. It’s primarily used for children with autism, but we were lucky and our insurance covered it for SMS. It’s through that that we have a therapist come to our house every day after school to help us all work through normal daily challenges. We also have babysitters who help us in the morning and after school. We have a solid group of friends with kids around the same age, and it’s always so wonderful to spend time together. It’s funny how you can feel like you’re the only one experiencing something—perhaps even more so with children with special needs—and then you talk to a friend about your problem and you find out they're going through something similar."

: "Yes, Claire goes to a wonderful public elementary school here in S.F. Both my husband and I went to public schools and we believe strongly in public education. Plus, Claire is required by law to get her therapies during the school day in a public school, but private schools don’t have to provide anything. We toured schools within 15 minutes of our house and narrowed it down to five choices that we felt could properly support Claire, because even though all public schools are supposed to be equally accommodating, they’re not. Getting her into the school we felt was best for her was honestly a bit of a nightmare. San Francisco works on a lottery system and gives children with IEPs no advantages if they’re participating in the general ed classroom. So, we ended up going through three rounds of lottery, plus a medical appeal, over a period of five months with no success. We’d planned on putting her in preschool for another year, when two weeks after public schools had started, we got a call that there was a spot open on the waitlist at our top school. It was a total relief, though it caught us a bit off guard since we’d already wrapped our brains around plan B. But it was a great decision and she’s grown leaps and bounds in kindergarten."

: Little Quinn is queen of her castle.

: "Each of our rooms has it’s own door color. Quinn’s is a really wonderful red that matches her energetic spirit. I paired it with a soft pink because I love that color combination—but I wanted to make sure it wasn’t a typical 'girly' palette. I began with a few pieces of art that told a bit of a story—a name banner I made when she came home from the hospital, a wonderful illustration of a fantastic city scene that felt full of joy, and a line drawing I drew for her shortly after she came home. Soon she was making her own art and we began adding it to the wall. Now it’s a giant collection of art made mostly by people we love, including Quinn. When I was a child, my mother hung a large painting I’d done on a piece of cardboard over our dining room table. I remember the pride I felt when she hung it up—that she thought it was good enough to hang on the wall. That’s something that I want my kids to feel, because I truly love their artwork."

: "I was an only child and my parents divorced when I was four, so I lived alone with my mom most of my life and visited my dad on the weekends. My mom worked about 45 minutes from our house, so I was on my own a fair amount. I spent a lot of time making things and painting. My parents were really supportive and encouraging of everything I did. I was a bit shy as a young child, but when I moved to a new town in fourth grade, I became incredibly outgoing. From that point on, I was very social—I had lots of friends, played sports, and was in all sorts of clubs and organizations. It was a pretty good childhood. When I was in high school, my mom was diagnosed with cancer and passed away when I was 20. The death of my mother, my biggest supporter, was and still is devastating. Still, all these years later, I miss her terribly. There is no connection like that of a mother and daughter. But I do find comfort in doing things she supported me in, like my art, and in talking to my daughters about her."

: Maude is just one of the girls.

: "It’s an evolving style. Claire needs a lot of routine and guidance, so that has influenced my style a lot. But as Quinn’s getting older, she’s a little boundary pusher and I want to make sure that I give her enough space to explore on her own. So, I’d say that I’m learning to balance between giving space to learn while being there to provide support when needed."

: Kelly wears a Gravel & Gold top. Quinn wears a Boden dress. Claire wears clothing from Target.

: "Yes, I think it’s hard not to be changed when you see what’s going on in our country. I want my voice to be heard and I want my daughters to always feel like they can say or do whatever they set their mind to. I think in the past I took for granted that our country had a positive momentum, and that even if it was slow, progress was being made. But now it’s clear that we have to work and fight for our rights more than ever. This is not the time to sit back."

: "Definitely no."

: "I’m an artist. I work with paper, clay, wood, and metal and explore collage within these different elements."

: The kids' colorful art-and-craft area sits right outside mom's studio.

: "My studio, which doubles as a guest room, is my happy place. It’s a kid-free zone where I’m able to close the door and work, listen to my music, and display my pieces without interruption. I wanted a flexible space, so I installed this giant pegboard that allows me to move shelving around as needed. I love having all of my art supplies in one place, close at hand, and if I need to run out, I can just leave my work on the desk and shut the door. The door is a nod to my bedroom door I had growing up. I was an only child and spent a lot of time making things. In middle school, I meticulously painted the back of my bedroom door with a rainbow grid of peace signs and little people. I’ve always thought back fondly of that crazy door, so when we started work on my studio, I made sure that the door was special."

: "I grew up in Michigan and was always pretty creative as a child. I loved to paint cardboard boxes and old furniture my mom picked up at garage sales. I went to Western Michigan University, first as an education major, but once I realized I could be something called a graphic designer I quickly changed my major. I met my husband, Aaron, in the design program, and we both graduated with a BFA in graphic design. Soon after graduation, I moved to Brooklyn with Aaron and after a few odd jobs, landed a position at a wonderful female-owned design studio called Beardwood&Co. It was a dream job, and I got to work with a wonderful group of super talented people for seven years. During that time I also started a food blog, eatmakeread, which was a nominee for food blog of the year by Saveur magazine. That blog led me to a crazy journey in food, where I dabbled in mixology for an underground supper club, briefly ran a catering company, and founded the food magazine Remedy Quarterly, which I designed, edited, and managed for nine years. In 2012, I left my design job and focused exclusively on food—I ran my blog and my magazine, and was a regular contributor and recipe developer to various food magazines and websites. In 2013, while seven months pregnant, we moved to San Francisco. I continued to publish my magazine, but in 2017, after nine years and two kids, it was no longer my passion. I officially closed it and reinvested myself in my art and I haven’t looked back. I truly feel that being an artist is my calling—it comes easy to me and brings me incredible joy. It’s not something I chose to do, it’s something I need to do."

: Kelly wears a Gravel & Gold top and Gap pants.

: "Motherhood has definitely informed what I do. After I had Claire, I lost some of my passion for cooking. It was no longer fun when I had to rush and test recipes between naps, so I cut back to just my magazine. Then after I had Quinn, I began to dread cooking, and even my magazine was no longer a thing of joy but a burden—I couldn’t see past all the tasks and couldn’t figure out how to have someone help after doing it alone for so long. I had also begun designing the renovation of our home and just couldn’t do it all. I decided to let my magazine go—and I said goodbye to that chapter of my life. It was very strange but liberating. In 2017, I began the 100-Day Project and a spark lit inside me. For the first time in a long time, I had ideas again. I was doing something for me, even if it was just 15 minutes. It was an incredible resurgence of creative energy that totally snowballed. And I was showing my girls what it is looks like to follow your passion. They saw me happy, they loved asking what I made at the clay studio. They were seeing me be something other than a mama and it made us all happy. I began working with clay, I pushed my collage work, I even learned how to weld and use power tools for metal and wood. I turned my #100daysofcolorandform into #ayearofcolorandform, which culminated in a show at Rare Device last year. Since then, I’ve got my own studio, with multiple shows in the works."

: "I just really think it’s important to make time for yourself and your relationships outside of parenthood. I know it’s not always easy, but if you can find a way to incorporate an activity for yourself into your routine, it makes a world of difference. And if it’s built into your routine, you don’t even have to think about it. My husband and I have a scheduled date night every week, which is a great time to just relax together; we each give each other time to go out with our friends in the evenings; and we tend to spend a lot of quality time together on the weekends—some weekends are amazing and feel super special, some are filled with lots of tantrums, and most are filled with a little of both. I carve out two work days where I have a solid eight hours to work and it gives me room to be creative and experiment."

: "Most definitely. I feel guilty when I don’t see my girls after school or when I need to leave and they’re not ready to say goodbye. I also feel guilty about how much time I’m spending with each of them. Parenting feels like such a juggling act, one where the balls are constantly changing. I just do my best and try to be honest with my kids."

: Works in progress.

: "This is something I think about a lot. I felt a definite void in my life before I focused on art. I love my girls so much, but after four years of staying at home with them, I needed more. I wanted my girls to see me doing something, specifically something I loved. I wanted them to hear me talking about something other than our daily life, and I wanted them to see what I was making and feel proud. I also want them to see how we treat our neighbors, to make connections with people, to feel like they can always ask for help."

: "I love the access to so many different experiences. I remember taking Claire for stroller rides shortly after we moved to S.F. from Brooklyn when she was a baby, and being in awe of the incredible plant life. I’m still blown away by it and try to expose my kids to nature as much as I can. I always tell them how amazing it is to live so close to the ocean—I don’t think they have a clue, but I don’t take it for granted one bit. It’s also incredibly important to me that they’re exposed to different people and cultures. One of my favorite events in the city is the Carnival parade when all the low-riders come out and show off their hydraulics and fancy paint jobs. It is an incredible sight. We have access to amazing art museums that I look forward to eventually taking them to—though now it’s more stressful that enjoyable."

: "Right now, I really can’t imagine living anywhere else, but who knows where life will take us."

: "Oh there are so many! My favorite clothing shops are Gravel & Gold, Voyager, Curator, and Lexington Standard. For eats, Third Cousin, Hawker Fare, La Taqueria, Ichi Sushi, Hook Fish, and Dad’s Luncheonette in Half Moon Bay. For the rare times I get to go out for a drink, I love The Royal Cuckoo, Old Devil Moon, and True Laurel for top notch cocktails. For coffee, Ritual Coffee, Pinhole Coffee, and Andytown are always great. For exploring: I love Moss Beach near Half Moon Bay—we always head to the Distillery next door for seaside bar food that’s kid friendly; Ocean Beach instantly relaxes me; Golden Gate Bridge Park, The Andy Goldsworthy Spire in the Presidio; Bernal Hill, Point Reyes Station. To get out and play we love Japantown—especially the bullet train sushi restaurant, Hikari—, bowling at Sea Bowl in Pacifica, Dolores Park, and the Bay Area Discovery Museum.

: Kelly wears a Black Crane top and knit chain necklace by Kapital. Quinn wears a Boden dress and Target pants. Claire wears a Boden dress and Kira Kids t-shirt.

: "Easy and modern. I tend to go with solid colors, a lot of black, with a little pop of color or pattern here and there."

: "Yes. I think motherhood has helped me have more of a perspective on what I want and how I want to present myself. I’m bolder and more consistent about the clothes and jewelry that I wear."

: "I have a pair of Seeker overalls that I absolutely love and wear all the time. I love Kira t-shirts because they have character and add a nice hit of pattern under a sweatshirt or overalls for running around with the kids. I have a few pieces from Gravel and Gold that are definitely staples—I’ve had some for years and I love how timeless they are while still being unique enough to stand out. Lastly, I love Black Crane—her lines are so good and have such a good fit for my body type."

: "I do it on a few different levels. Sometimes it's as simple as taking a drive out to the ocean and just sitting and staring for a while, or taking a walk up to Bernal and watching the birds fly. It’s funny how something so small can make such a big difference. I’ve also starting taking a weekend or two a year to getaway by myself. I usually don’t go far, but I stay in a hotel, get a massage, and have fun by myself. It’s a time to reflect on my needs and what I like about myself—things that are important to remember but easily get lost in the day to day activities."

: "I’m excited to continue evolving and showing my work. I’ve got a handful of shows in the works that I’m excited about and I look forward to connecting more with the wonderful creative community here in S.F."
Kelly wears Black Crane overalls and Uniqlo top. Claire wears a Boden dress.

: For more on Kelly, her work, and her amazing family, follow her on Instagram.

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