Mother Stories
After A Tragic Fire, Amy Soderlind Gets A New Modern Nursery
Written by Katie Hintz-Zambrano
Photography by Photographed by Maria Del Rio
Oct 16, 2018
A beautiful example of light, love, and resiliency, Amy Soderlind‘s story is an absolutely must-read. The freelance stylist and mother of two sons (Myles Adriannus, 4, and Sol Nash, 1), went through one of the most horrific periods of her life just one year ago, when the devastating Tubbs Fire—the most destructive wildfire in California history—woke her family of four up in the middle of the night, forcing them to evacuate their home in just minutes.
Lucky for Amy and her family, they survived the blaze, even if their home didn’t. She credits the help of numerous friends and strangers for helping them get back onto their feet. And the help continues to pour in. Thanks to Pottery Barn’s brand-new Modern Baby line, Amy’s youngest son, Sol (who was only 5 weeks old during last year’s blaze) just scored a revamped nursery all his own.
Just launched over the summer, Pottery Barn Modern Baby is filled with hundreds of modern and contemporary designs, split into five main design categories—Glam Modern, Hip Modern, Natural Modern, Casual Modern, and Minimal Modern—that can work in a variety of spaces. Bonus points: all wooden and upholstered furniture in the Pottery Barn Modern Baby collection is GREENGUARD certified, while all cotton bedding is 100% organic.
To create a space just for baby Sol, Amy chose a mix of items from Pottery Barn Modern Baby—which includes furniture, wall art, lighting, bedding, rugs, decorative accessories, and baby gear. Check out her brand-new nursery reveal below, while taking in her touching story of passion and perseverance.
This post is brought to you by Mother + Pottery Barn Modern Baby
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"We moved here last year, after we lost our old home in the Tubbs Fire. We moved in November of 2017, coming up on a year now. It's tucked away in the hills of Bennett Valley—equal distance to Petaluma, Santa Rosa, and Glen Ellen/Kenwood in Northern California. Our dear friend of over 20 years also lost her home in the fire, and she found us all this place. Three separate buildings on 5 acres. It provides us with communal living, but also our own space and sanctuary. It's been a healing place for us all to recoup. I’m looking forward to building our future house...wherever that may be."
In Sol's brand-new nursery, featuring the following Pottery Barn Modern Baby products:
Nash Dresser, $849, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Woven Pom Pom Storage, $29-$49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Cloud Fringe Mirror, $99, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Nash Crib, $599, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Wood Circles Mobile, $49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"Earthy, modern, natural."
Wood Circles Mobile, $49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Nash Crib, $599, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"Find meaningful pieces that tell your story, that evoke a happiness in you, that remind you of a place, or sound, or smell. Your home is an extension of you, of everything that makes you feel full and peaceful. There needs to be harmony in my living space—it's a place where I can take a deep breath and be completely at ease. Rustic wood touches, modern simple furniture, beautiful rugs, white walls, and artwork that makes you feel."
Nash Dresser, $849, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Woven Pom Pom Storage, $29-$49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Cloud Fringe Mirror, $99, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Nash Crib, $599, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Wood Circles Mobile, $49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"Functionality. Also, one trunk of toys and a rotating book shelf. I cover Myles' room in his artwork and things he finds along the way he loves. It's important to allow them to make it their own once they are old enough."
Wood Circles Mobile, $49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Nash Crib, $599, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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- Amy wears a vintage shirt, vintage Maverick jeans, and vintage jewelry. Sol wears a Zara sweater.
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- Wood Circles Mobile, $49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"Oh my. It was a disaster of nothing before this makeover. There was a queen bed, usually covered with two or three piles of laundry, an old crib, a TV I had covered with a tapestry...that's it. This is the first time Sol has had his very own space."
Nash Dresser, $849, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Woven Pom Pom Storage, $29-$49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Nash Crib, $599, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"The Nash crib and dresser. I love the clean lines and lighter wood. It makes this very small space seem airy and open. Also, since having this chair, Sol and I fall asleep together rocking every night. It's been a game changer. What have I been doing without this?!"
Nash Dresser, $849, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Woven Pom Pom Storage, $29-$49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Nash Crib, $599, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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Good At Naps Knit Pillow Sham, $39, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Lattice Pillow Sham, $29.50, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Organic Gray Falling Dot Crib Fitted Sheet, $24, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Nash Crib, $599, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"Corralled. There is one basket in each room for toys. The boys know how to clean up after themselves. Our room is off limits. We do books in our bed, but otherwise no toys there. As soon as an overflow happens, we rotate or donate. In the kitchen, while I cook, I just throw Tupperware and a strange spatula on the ground and that will keep them busy for 30 minutes or so."
Good At Naps Knit Pillow Sham, $39, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Lattice Pillow Sham, $29.50, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Organic Gray Falling Dot Crib Fitted Sheet, $24, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Nash Crib, $599, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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- "It was around midnight. I was asleep with baby Sol on my chest. Lauren had fallen asleep with Myles in his bed reading books. We were still in that hazy postpartum daze, where days and nights all blend together, where one particular hour has no more significance than any other. I was still healing, spending most of my days in bed with Sol attached to my breast, binge watching shows and eating sushi in bed. We lived in a 150-year-old farmhouse, on 100 acres of old trees and open fields. The smoke that crept in the old age cracks of our home is what woke Lauren from a dead sleep. I remember waking up thinking he was burning newspaper or sage directly under my nose, I woke up swearing at hime, 'WTF are you doing?! I’m finally sleeping...'"
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- "He was at the bottom of our bed, phone screen glowing, searching Cal Fire and any other updates he could get. The trees around our house were blocking our view from just how close the fire already was, all the while we are attached to our devices, not even aware a fire was happening. We found nothing online, no evacuations...nothing. We were on that first block between Mark West and Fountain Grove, that got hit first and hard, before authorities had a handle on updates and evacuations. Lauren walked outside—winds were 50mph—ash was falling like snow. He drove down our driveway to see the fire barreling down the hillside towards our home. We quickly packed our boys in the car, our dog, and a few of my mother's original artworks. We were out of there in 5 minutes."
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- "Our driveway was one narrow car width, and about a mile long. Winding down to highway 101. I’ll never forget looking in the rear view mirror, a fire tsunami in waves enveloping the land and trees, knowing right then that our house and all that she held would soon be gone. And focusing on Myles' face—wide eyed, bare feet... And he just started singing, calm and steady...'All you need is love, ba da da da da, all you need is love. Love, love is all you need.' He sang this over and over until we reached a safe place for the night. Lauren followed in his car, and before I even parked in the driveway of my mother-in-law's, Lauren had turned around. He had forgotten to check our neighbors—one Dutch woman in her eighties who lived alone and didn't drive, and another woman in her nineties down below us, who also lived alone with her two dogs. He reached them just in time. They were both asleep. He picked them up out of their beds and ran. We estimate our house was gone within 20-30 minutes after that."
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- Sloan Storage Bookcase, $499, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"Survival mode. I cried for the first time two days after we got a photo of our house. I was in the shower, finally alone, drinking a cold beer. I just started bawling. I cried it all out—everything in me. That was the first and last time I cried in sorrow. I got out of that shower, wrapped in a robe, swollen eyes, and got on the floor with Myles (and my beer) and played Legos with him for 3 hours straight. I knew right then and there, that there was no room for my prolonged sadness. We had each other, our lives. I knew Myles would be ok as long as I was present with him. Right there. All of me. It’s so easy to get caught up in the heaviness of it all—my children saved me from that. Right away, it wasn’t about what was, but what was next. Finding joy in all the small things again, even though life all around you is heavier than it's ever been."
Nash Dresser, $849, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Woven Pom Pom Storage, $29-$49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Cloud Fringe Mirror, $99, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"I protected Myles from it for the first few days. There was a night, three days or so after we fled, where Myles asked to see a photo of our house on fire. I asked him, 'Are you sure? I don't want to make you sad.' 'Yes, I am sure,' he said. I showed him a photo. He looked up at me, tenderly but very serious, 'Now that, that is a fuuuuuucccccck. And a god damnit. Right, Mama?' 'Sure is,' I said, laughing. 'It really is. That is an appropriate time to use that word.' Then he followed with questions about what I would miss most about our home. What Papa was sad to no longer have. 'Our sun porch where I painted...' 'Oh, I am so sorry you can’t paint there anymore, mama.' He would then tell me the items he would miss most...his big boy bed we just bought him, the juicer, the chickens... He needed to be a part of our grieving, included as his own individual self, to be angry and feel sorry for our loss, as a family and as all individuals. He blew my mind."
Nash Dresser, $849, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Woven Pom Pom Storage, $29-$49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Cloud Fringe Mirror, $99, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"Physically, I was wrecked. New baby, no sleep, body not ready to be hauling and moving us from house to house, with nowhere to really end up. From the first morning of this nightmare, I had thousands of messages from people wanting to help. Strangers, friends, friends of friends... I was brought to my knees hundreds of times just by the sheer beauty in people—how many amazing humans I am lucky to know, the support we felt from the instant this happened to the months following was truly astounding. Houses, cars, clothes, letters, meals... People sent me art work, old vintage Levi's, art sets for Myles, guitars for Lauren. This horribly traumatic situation brought more tears of joy than I can convey. Every day was turned into minute-by-minute, stay present, be thankful, and help as many other people—in the same situation but with less connections to such a giving community—as we possibly could."
Woven Pom Pom Storage, $29-$49, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"I think even now, it's still ebbing and flowing. When everything is taken from you, you learn a lot about yourself. Some of it isn’t very pretty...some parts of you are revealed that you don’t much like to see or acknowledge. It's usually in the hardest times that the weakest and strongest parts of you arise, you are forced to see the bits of you that are so easily squashed when things are great. To say I was attached to my things that made up our home would be a gross understatement. I am a visual person with sincere love for design and spaces, of beautiful meaningful objects. Fabrics from our first trips together, paintings of my mother's, jewelry, my vintage clothing collection, a favorite couch I spent years searching for and finally found on Craigslist—these things gave me life...or so I thought. I would sit in my home and be happy surrounded by memories and the evident memorabilia. It was a history of our life together over the last decade, each object having its place in both heart and wall or floor space. But that is just it. They are just memories in object form, the moments don't leave your memory or being. We still took that trip. I had great moments with that couch. The paintings were beautiful and in my mind they still are. What I am saying is, home meant a great deal to me then and it meant even more to me with the birth of our second son. It gave me deep inner peace and we had spent a long time creating a space that was just right. You think you can't live with certain things, then boom—life takes it. Life goes on, you live (thankfully), and you realize things are just things. Home is community. Home is our family. We are really fucking lucky to love each other the way we do, and have so many incredible people in our lives."
Paxton Recliner, $1099, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Collins Side Table, $159, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"Others. Our friends and family. One another. Helping others. The best way to heal is to give. Even if you think you have nothing to give, give what you can."
Amy wears a Kenzo top, vintage Maverick jeans, and Freda Salvador shoes.
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- "Don't be too proud to ask for help. Find that person that doesn’t pity you or feel sorry for you, but reminds you of the strength you have and the fight that still is to be had. Use your body, meditate, don't hide in the loneliness of sorrow."
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- "As a person, it’s reminded me of the coming and goings of all things, the guarantee that nothing is guaranteed, and to hold on to the people that stay steady in love through the hardest of times. As a woman, it revealed the beauty, grace, and strength in complete vulnerability. As a mother, it taught me, once again, to be in the present moment. Enjoy every second."
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"That I will know these two humans forever. And they will teach me more than I can possibly fathom."
Paxton Recliner, $1099, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Collins Side Table, $159, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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- "That while I will know these two humans forever, there still will come a time where they move on from our home and onto their own."
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"I have three older brothers. My hunch was that my body would make what it understands. I knew I would have a boy with my first. For Sol, my second, I wasn’t sure. We found out beforehand with both. Knowing made it more real for me. With Myles, I was 28. I still felt like I had so much to do as a childless woman, and there were parts of me during his pregnancy that were in complete denial of the actuality that I would have a baby after these 9 months were up. Knowing it was a boy helped me bond with something that felt so very confusing for me. With Sol, I sank into pregnancy. I enjoyed it so much more—the good and the bad. I embraced it with a knowledge only experience can give you. I knew how fast it would pass, and I really understood what was happening to my body this time around. I fell in love with the female body after Myles was born. Within seconds of meeting him, the second thing after our hellos and eye gazing and crying was...whoa. Women are so incredible. I'm just in awe of women and our capabilities. I feel a sense of duty to raise a future of good men. Men that will inspire other men to be better, to step up. Men that honor all women, all people, all cultures, all races. Men that understand what hard work is, what it is to show up and be there even if it's not convenient. Men that don't expect anything to be handed to them."
Paxton Recliner, $1099, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
Collins Side Table, $159, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"No. I really didn’t. When I got pregnant with Myles, I was terrified. Terrified of the death of my sense of self, my identity, my career, my freedom. I was so confused how I would do it all, stay passionate in my relationship, spend the time with my child, and still work in a career I cared deeply about."
Paxton Recliner, $1099, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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- "Both pregnancies were fairly normal. I had both boys at home with my incredible midwife Shiela and husband Lauren. Both were around 8-9 hours of labor."
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- "Neither of us have that with our jobs. I freelance, he owns his own business. In many ways, it’s worked for us. With both kids, I took 9-10 months off for the first year of their lives. Lauren was able to be with us much more than many, and I know we are very lucky in that respect."
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- "I’ve never read a parenting book. Maybe there have been times I should, and probably will be more in the future. I’ve learned to trust my intuition, ask my friends who I admire as parents, and know challenging moments pass, and new ones arise. My parental gut is there, the more I trust it the stronger it becomes. Also, both of my kids couldn't be more different. What worked for Myles didn’t stick for Sol, and vice versa. You think you have it nailed, and then boom, you feel completely lost again in knowing nothing. I would say try to enjoy each stage, because even in the darkest times of no sleep, teething, cracked nipples, aching bodies, there will be a time you yearn for all of it back."
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- "My own mother. I couldn’t make up a more idyllic childhood. She gave us all the tools and then the freedom to use those tools if we wished, and in the ways we chose. She was loving and nurturing but also pushed us to be independent thinkers in charge of our own actions. I wanted to do the right thing as a child, but wasn't scared of fucking up. I remember always watching her paint in her studio. Wearing clothing she made, high waisted Levi's, oversized billowing shirts rolled up over her elbows...drenched in turquoise and hand-batiked head scarfs. She was a vision. An artist. We lived 4 miles out on a little dirt road in the middle of the Redwoods and this woman, my mother, exuded personal style because it was her innate self. This was every bit her natural self, my earliest memory of real authentic style."
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"FernGully meets Paul Bunyan. On 180 acres of old growth Redwood forest. I rode my shetland pony, Tigress, to kindergarten."
Nash Dresser, $849, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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- "A deep and profound love for nature. Respect for animals. And you best know these two will know how to build a fire and grow their own food."
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"My husband Lauren and I see eye to eye, even when we do things different. We respect our children as their own beings. We are ok with them making mistakes. We talk to them, explaining everything, as we would to anyone else. We love hard—hugging and kissing and singing and dancing is a huge part of our relationship."
Evo Rug, $699, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"I’m more dedicated than ever to raising good humans who care about our earth and the people that she holds."
Evo Rug, $699, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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- "Don't read too much. Get out of your head. Get out of your own way. Trust your body, it knows what to do. Be ready to be more challenged than you ever have been, but also understand what true love and joy is. Also, all the shit moments are totally worth it."
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- "Spend as much quality time with your oldest as you can. Make special dates just for them, and let them be involved in your time as a family with the new baby. Myles' favorite thing was getting into bed with all of us, book in hand, right in the middle. He would sigh, 'This is the life.' He was a part of it all."
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- "Who knows. I’m not saying yes. I'm not saying no. It seems insane for me to even think that I could do three, but one thing I do know by now is I know nothing about tomorrow, let alone years from now."
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"Seventies and Nineties love child."
Evo Rug, $699, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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- "Less boho, still vintage. More modern, more sophisticated, and simple. Still has to be completely functional and fuss free."
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"My beloved ankle boots from Paloma Wool, a vintage shearling coat a girlfriend recently sent me, my favorite vintage denim Lee/Levi's/Wranglers, a good pair of high-waisted ankle trousers, men's button-down shirts, beret, and hoops."
Amy wears a vintage dress, Lack of Color hat, and Freda Salvador shoes.
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"I love a woman comfortable in her skin and whatever makes her feel feminine and powerful. I personally love exaggerated silhouettes, high waists, ankle/wide legged pants, plaids, and textures. Fall is my favorite season for personal style."
Sol wears a Nico Nico onesie.
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"We received so many donations last year, I still haven’t bought my kids clothing in the last year. I try and do all second hand. They grow so fast, it's exhausting trying to keep up. I love anything soft and of quality organic materials for both kids. Myles has his own sense of style and I let him rock whatever he is feeling."
Mongolian Fur Rocker, $189, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"Vintner's Daughter botanical serum. Essentials from Ebb & Flow—I'm obsessed with everything they make. Roots & Bones adaptogens. And dry shampoo."
Mongolian Fur Rocker, $189, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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- "I’m addicted to inferno pilates. In a hot, dark room, with loud music, HIIT training on a mat with meditation at the end. I feel so amazing after each class. Full body with a mind-clearing finish. The times I’ve found a good routine of going 3-4 days a week, it's completely altered the core of my spirit."
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- "The boys are asleep at 8pm. I get in the bath with the lights off and candles lit. I read. Hang out with my man. Every once in a while I do a face mask in said bath and in those moments I really feel like I'm killin’ it."
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- "I style people, sets, bands, and brands."
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- "I grew up where the Redwoods meet the ocean in Mendocino, CA. A small coastal town on the cliffs with one stoplight and more B&B's than anyone needs. I was raised in a family of artists and creatives. I went to UC Davis undergrad for my BA. Then the Academy of Art University for my MFA. I lived in S.F. for years, then got back together with my life-long love, Lauren, and traveled to Africa and Bali. We moved in together in Sebastopol, and have since lived all around Sonoma County. I’ve been with my agency, Workgroup, for 7 years now. My agent is incredible, our relationship is solid, and she and I have worked hard together over all these years."
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"Motherhood has given an informal middle finger whilst smirking at my career, because while it still matters deeply to me (it always will), it will never again be first, never again be my #1 priority."
A look at Amy's aforementioned beauty essentials.
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"Lauren’s mother lives nearby. Her help is the reason I’m able to work, have date nights, and have weekends away with my girlfriends. My mom lives a few hours away in Mendocino and will come stay when I need her. I have an incredible group of women who my sons love deeply, and they help in all the ways."
Amy's favorite shoes line-up.
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"No matter how I try, I will never feel like I am doing the best I can. It's a battle I’ve come to know I can’t win, but I understand it, and welcome it. My best advice is find the small moments of self-care to fill your cup back up. You have to find solace in the moments you can. I have found that if I am at peace—in my body and in my spirit—then my relationship with Lauren is at its best. And if my relationship with my partner is healthy and strong, my children will only benefit from that. They see how much their parents love each other every day."
A vignette of favorite kids' pieces.
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"I deal with it every job I take or every job I don't take. Either I’m not working enough or not spending enough time with my kids. It's so easy to get in a cycle of self-loathing bullshit. I try and see the big picture and be completely present in what I am doing that day. I know how hard I work will be a great example for my children, and to see their mother love what she does is even better."
Sloan Toy Chest, $349, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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"Live my life with intention. Be kind. Love. As for goals, there is something brewing and I hope to share it with you soon."
Sloan Toy Chest, $349, Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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For more on Amy and her family, follow along on her Instagram feed.
For more on the beautiful children's furnishings seen in this feature, check out Pottery Barn Modern Baby.
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