Mother Stories
At Home With Musician Annie Hart of Au Revoir Simone
Written by Erin Feher
Photography by Photography by Anna Maria Lopez
Oct 29, 2019
Today we are hanging out with one of our musical heroines: Annie Hart is a founding member of the pioneering synth-pop trio Au Revoir Simone. She is also a mama to two creative, music-loving kids (8 and 4 years old) who are living their best lives in Queens, NY. Annie launched her solo career, complete with a world tour, in 2017, and doesn’t gloss over the fact that being a mom and a professional, touring musician comes with its share of challenges. But it also lets her be exactly the kind of woman she wants to be: creative, driven, and devoid of a soul-sucking day job. We spent the day with Annie and her sweet son and daughter, sat in on a family jam session, and got to know a little about what the juggle looks like when you’re recording an album, making guest appearances on Twin Peaks, and raising two little humans at the same time. Her brand new album, A Softer Offering, comes out December 13th, and she invites all you NYC folks to come celebrate with her that night at Union Pool in Williamsburg, where she will be playing a live set. In the meantime, take a tour of her classic New York City home, and get to know a little more about this musical mama by clicking through the full tour below.
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- "I’d been trying to buy a house for about a decade, and my husband and I were able to snatch one up after the big financial crisis. It was literally the cheapest one in the nicest neighborhood we could find. It wasn’t fancy, but we were willing to put in some serious sweat and hard work to make it as perfect as it could be. And more importantly, not give any more money to our crummy landlord at the rental who didn’t really care when the ceiling caved in over our son’s crib! Thankfully, we had already moved him out of there."
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- "When I would try to find design ideas for our living space on Pinterest, I would always end up finding something by searching 'boho chic,' but this place totally isn’t! I would say it combines the charm of a beat-up classic London brown-brick home with that special WWII-era NYC architecture that you find in just about 50 percent of the city's housing stock. It certainly features a lot of the original architecture. I got a lot of my ideas from the website Remodelista."
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- "We did. We had come from a couple of places that had that awful slap-dash, landlord-style renovation, so I was all up-in-arms against that. I read an amazing book from the library that gave extremely specific details on how to renovate your home according to the era in which it was built. I wish I could remember the title! It was a compendium of cantankerous zines that had come out in the 1980s guiding people in the West Village and Park Slope how to not destroy the character of their homes by fitting a round hole in a square peg, so to speak. We tried to leave everything as it was, and even looked up on the NYC.gov photo archive what the exterior had looked like when it was built, and tried to go from there."
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- "I agree with that book and think it’s best to honor your home’s bones and not force some different idea on it. You can have really bold ideas and change things, but if you don’t do it in a way the home can support, you’re obviously not in the right house! I also refuse to buy anything unless it is perfect. For example, we are still using my parents’ old folding table for our dining table until I find the perfect one. There’s no sense in having some cheap placeholder junk that you are just going to throw out come into the house in the first place. Patience is key."
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- "I am so lucky to have it! I use it nearly every day. Last house we owned, we really did the whole sound-proofing thing, with new walls, and this one we just kind of moved into in a hurry. So, honestly, it’s not aesthetically my favorite space, but it’s my own and it fits all my music stuff and all that outweighs anything else. It’s a great place to get caught up in your ideas."
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- "I do all of it here, with the exception of some residencies at studios. It is hard. I imagine your readership is parents, so they will understand that, man, it is hard. The difficulties lie in having extended time without children, housework, appointments, and meetings taking me out of my headspace. It’s a true struggle, but I am motivated by the fear of not being able to do art from home as my job and having to get a full-time job in some field I am good at but detest, so I just go and plow forward and make sure it happens. I have a little note right in front of my eyes that says 'Motivation follows action' to help remind me to just move forward, even in slow motion."
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- "Case-in-point to what I was saying before, we couldn’t find the perfect loft bed that could convert to bunks when our daughter aged out of her crib, so my husband made one. We painted it partially the same color as their bureau for cohesion. it’s a fairly small space, so we had to fit enough storage for all their stuff. It was really important for us to have books be accessible, so we put them on a long, low shelf that they can reach without tipping over. And then, of course, we let the kids decorate! It’s not all what I would choose, but then again, I don’t sleep there."
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- "We are obsessed with books and music in my house, so those tend to dominate any and all decorating ideas we choose. We all love putting on a record and cozying up with a book. It was important to me that a space for that felt light and green and comfortable. I love houseplants, and made lace curtains behind them from a tablecloth to maximize light in the room. I put my $3 curtains on some $80 curtain rod, but that’s how I make it look pulled together as best as I can. The rug we got in an antique store ages ago—it washes so well and has handled many takeout, art supply, and potty-training incidents."
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- "I have a little office upstairs with a small secretary desk and matching cabinet. From the window, you can see two trees and lots of sunlight. It has cozy bookshelves and an electric piano that I write music on in the daytime. My son has a desk in there, where he does his homework or Legos, so it’s sweet to work together."
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- "I really, really try to corral it, but my four-year-old has other ideas. We have dedicated, easily accessible space for toys in the living room and of course their bedroom. But we have definitely fallen victim to the old kid’s toy spread that happens to everyone at some point! Now we have Lego's in the office as I’ve mentioned, and my daughter also likes to make her own bedroom—no, not just bed, but entire bedroom—next to our bed to hang out in before she heads to her room. And I really, really try to keep the toys out of my studio in the basement. That’s a no-toy zone, though they do have their own instruments they can use in the space. I just need a dedicated area where I can have a complete musical thought, and it’s hard enough to do that without additional enticements for them down there."
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- "I love really feeling true, true unconditional love and knowing that I’m raising two beautiful, responsible people working for the force of good."
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- "I’m a New Yorker, so, like, everything! I’m worried they will get into any of the same dumb situations I did when I was younger, I mean, one time at a party in Williamsburg, I was caught from falling off a roof! I’m worried they won’t look carefully when crossing the street. I’m worried they’ll get in an abusive relationship. The list goes on, but I try to keep the neurotic part to myself and just educate them on how to stay aware."
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- "I didn’t care either time, but I just felt it for both of them and the sonograms proved me right. I really like how anti-stereotypical they are in gender roles. My son is sensitive and quietly thoughtful, and my daughter is a true force of nature. That all gives me hope that they are going to turn out okay."
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- "I named my daughter after a restaurant we were eating at when I was pregnant and STARVING."
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- "One is 8 and one is 4, and of course the little one copies the big one, so they both love Lego, reading, art, climbing trees, and imagining situations."
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- "Yes, I would not infrequently have a few drinks on tour and then go on to some poor soul about how badly I wanted a baby. Looking back, I hope they didn’t think I was coming on to them! But my desire for kids was strong. I’ve always babysat and played with little ones. I love little people and the elderly dearly."
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- "Oh, thank goodness that is over. The second time I had kind of weird medical staff that would tell me something was wrong and then it was kind of never talked about, so I was left like, not knowing if the pregnancy was happening or viable, and then it just kind of went on. But I couldn’t really get excited about it, because I thought something was wrong with the fetus, and then the sonogram people weren’t properly talking to my OB to let me know if it was okay, so it was kind of a weird time, to say the least. I’m not excited to go down memory lane there."
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- "As a songwriter, you just write when inspiration strikes, but yeah, I stopped touring for a few months."
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- "1-2-3 Magic. If you follow it calmly, it really is magic."
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- "I love chill moms who actually discipline their children. When I find them, I copy their moves."
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- "I was 'unschooled,' so I had a lot of freedom. I had lots and lots of free time, and was allowed to really be a self-starter and pursue my scientific and generally nerdy—think stamp collecting—interests as deeply as I wanted."
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- "Loving and disciplined. I involve my kids in chores and housework, not just putting their toys away at the end of the day, but also vacuuming, dusting, deep-cleaning their room. They thrive on it. I also don’t let misbehaviors fly. I let my kids have tantrums on the sidewalk if they need to. If they cry in a restaurant, I take them outside until it stops. I don’t give in to their whims to get them to stop, that’s the best way to raise a brat. A lot of times a toddler will whip themselves into a frenzy, and that’s when you get on their eye level and just offer them some love or a hug, validate their feelings, but you don’t give in to whatever bratty thing they want. But aside from that, I’m not very strict. And they also get lots and lots of snuggles and quality time doing art, reading, all that."
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- "I actually decided to have another child so that there would hopefully be more people on the planet who know how to take care of it properly when I am gone. I am very concerned with Americans making educated decisions, so I talk about the news with them and current events and we all get involved politically. We write letters and go to protests, to show them how many people are involved in caring about the world, and how we have to take responsibility for our own actions."
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- "If you tell a child you are going to do something, do it. Don’t say something like, 'If you keep doing that, we’re leaving right now,' and then not leave when they do the thing again. My brother gave me that advice and it was the best ever! It only takes doing something once for the kid to take you seriously. It also teaches you to only say what you mean."
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- "Nope, two is plenty!"
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- "I’m a composer and performer of my own music. I score films and tour the world playing concerts."
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- "I grew up on Long Island, went to college at Hunter College and was in the honors program, which back then, basically meant you could study whatever the hell you wanted to. I spent a year in Puerto Rico studying there and of course learned a lot of Spanish, but ended up majoring in Women’s Studies and Media Criticism. At Hunter, I worked at Shakespeare and Company booksellers on the Upper East Side, and my friends there forced me to be in their band, and not just in the band, but the singer and guitarist, neither or which I was remotely qualified for. But that morphed into my next band, Au Revoir Simone, and through some stroke of luck and very hard work, we got pretty popular, and I quit my day job at a non-profit."
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- "It definitely made being in a band difficult. Having a tiny baby around makes you have to rehearse in fits and starts, so by the time I had my second child, Au Revoir Simone was slowing down, and I just kept on working, but there was no one else to collaborate with who shared my wacky, spur-of-the moment schedule, so I defaulted to a solo artist."
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- "Yes, I could not do this without my husband also being a self-employed, flexible person. He’s totally on board to take the kids when I go on tour for a few weeks. Of course, I do the same for him. But our parents are also so helpful and we have some beautiful neighbors we are close with who are always there in a pinch."
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- "It’s important to just keep going, and to make art you are proud of. And while you do that, support your kids and partner, if you have one, in encouraging them in their own ventures. It’s really important to speak up for yourself. I think sometimes some of us just assume it has to be us to cook and clean and get the kids from school. But if you can swing it, let the other person do the work. And what really pays off is raising your kids to be responsible for their own stuff. Don’t get me wrong, years two and three are TOUGH putting up with all the toddler stuff, but if you can stick to it, you end up with kids who help empty the dishwasher!"
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- "I try and make them see firsthand what goes into making music. I show them how recording works and have them help wrap cables or test microphones with me. Then my husband will take them to soundcheck or the concert to show how it happens. It’s so important to me to have them know how cool stuff gets done. To me in the suburbs as a kid, culture was a mystery that I consumed. Now I know so many key players in the creation of culture, and I want my kids to know that, too. That the way of the world isn’t just some random thing that happened, that people make it, and empower them to have the knowhow to make it the way they want, too."
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- "I have a new record, A Softer Offering, coming out December 13th, and I’ll be playing Union Pool in Williamsburg that night to celebrate. I’ll also be heading to Europe and to select U.S. cities in 2020 to tour."
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- "No, I don’t get that, because my husband or family is usually there with the kids when I am not. And I truly believe that 'it takes a village.' You child is shaped by so many experiences and people, you can’t control all that, or they won’t have a sense of flexibility or independence. But when I am with my kids, I am really with them. We only have the T.V. on for a little while a couple days a week, and we do not have an iPad in the house, and there are zero kids' games on my phone. We have a lot of hands-on time playing board games and doing art together. So, I don’t feel bad or weird about leaving them from time to time, or having aftercare at school a few days a week, because they know I love them unconditionally."
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- "This is really important for me. I do my best to take responsibility for my actions, check in with loved ones about their feelings, and am an active volunteer and political participant. I look to nature and see how baby animals just copy their parents, so I act how I want my kids to act."
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- "Velvet leggings from American Apparel. I wear them with everything. The company has sadly been bought by Gildan and now they make their stuff at a far lower quality in China, which is such a bummer. I liken AA to someone you broke up with and then realized what a gift you had, because I hardly paid them any attention until they were JUST about to go out of business. I also really love North Of West, which is from Portland and made in the USA. The pieces are really well made and have such a flattering fit for my figure."
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- "I mostly make my own beauty products. I love to mix organic, cold-pressed rosehip oil, green coffee bean oil, and argan oil together for my face. Sometimes I throw in some Auracacia rose or sandalwood oil. I make my own luxurious face wash with oatmeal powder, sunflower seed or almond flour, and ground fennel. It feels so good and gets my makeup off. Speaking of, I really love Ilia lipsticks and Dr. Haushka mascara. I put on a spritz of Carta Moena 12/69 perfume and suddenly, I’m sophisticated."
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- "I have become obsessed with Iyengar yoga. I have been doing yoga for about, oh goodness, on and off 20 years now, but something compelled me to open Yoga: The Iyengar Way and I have been doing it every day for eight weeks now. My body has completely changed. I have pink in my cheeks again, my metabolism is incredible, I feel and look at least five years younger. Must be all the shoulder stands! I do incorporate meditation and also study Buddhist philosophy, which has truly helped me be more at peace in my relationships and to be kind to myself."
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- "I love to take a good bath with epsom salts and fancy essential oils, like rose mixed with basil. I’ll bring a crossword puzzle or a magazine and a glass of wine and it’s just heaven. Of course, there’s always some child sneaking his or her way into my little paradise, so then I cap it all off playing with toy boats!"
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- "My favorite aspect of living in NYC is all of the incredible free events! Sometimes I dream of living in Manhattan, since there are so many more there, but nevertheless, I don’t ever have a hard time entertaining the kids in meaningful ways. There are so many more opportunities to experience culture and science than I had in the suburbs. I also love the proximity to people. I get really busy, so it’s so nice to have a beautiful community of people right outside my door."
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- "Pragmatic. But I think I’m rapidly veering into museum-lady fashion, I secretly want to wear billowy linen and Matisse scarves. On stage, my favorite outfit is a catsuit because it is basically like wearing a black box. Nothing says chicly 'I hate what clothing represents in our society' like a plain black catsuit! The funniest change is now I hate wearing jeans. I never noticed how uncomfortable they are until I wore maternity jeans with the elastic waist. Ha!"
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- "There is a great park in Queens called Highland Park, connected to the Ridgewood Reservoir, that feels so wild. It’s a fantastic place to bring your kids to ride bikes, hike or picnic. We are fans of Spring Shabu Shabu in Flushing, an enormous hotpot place filled with so many fresh food options. The kids are obsessed with it. We also love going to the library, any library, really, but especially the nicer ones in Manhattan or the main Brooklyn branch at Grand Army Plaza."
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- "I think about it from time to time, but it would be really hard to keep up the musical connections and options I’m getting here. I would hardly ever go to shows if we ended up upstate or something, for example."
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- "Well, this album release is going to be taking up a lot of my energy, and I am determined to stay organized and focused on its getting out there to the world properly. My goal is to stay active in the music scene and not let early bedtime-ennui keep me out of my beautiful artistic and friend-filled life."
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- For more on Annie Hart, her family, and her music, be sure to follow her on Instagram.
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This might be my favorite one yet.
Another nice series of a mom barefoot at home. My favorites are picture #2 (her pedicure is cute!), #12 (her wrinkly bare sole is gorgeous!), and pictures #19 and #20 (Annie playing piano in her lovely bare feet makes for 2 beautiful pictures).