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Ways To Connect With Your Baby Before Birth

Written by

Kristen Vandivier

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For many expectant parents, the bond between you and your baby starts the moment you realize you are carrying your little one. Tuning in to that silent connection can be one of the most precious experiences of new parenthood, and is also one of the most beneficial. Studies have shown that babies learn and can recognize words in the womb. And, according to researchers at the University of Cambridge, mothers who “connect” with their baby during pregnancy are more likely to have positive interactions with him or her after the birth. That all sounds great, however, life rarely slows down just because you’re expecting, and the stress of the daily grind can make it difficult to turn your awareness inward. 

Which is why there is never a better time to learn a foundational meditation practice than when you are pregnant. as the baby receives all the bliss chemistry you do. Also, your subtle awareness, and therefore your ability to sense your baby, is heightened. Any meditation is good, though committing to a class has a far greater potential for success than downloading a 99 cent app. I recommend Vedic Meditation (which I teach), or Transcendental Meditation, as they are effortless practices and are meant for people with busy lives. If you are already a mediator, be aware that the detox effect of meditation, especially during the first trimester, can cause some nausea, so if this happens to you, meditate more frequently for shorter spans. 

Below are a few suggestions on how to nurture that prenatal bond.

  • Close the eyes and bring your awareness to your womb.
  • Feel for the subtle swirling orb of “aliveness” that is your baby’s consciousness.
  • Sit with it in your simplest form of awareness.
  • Next, feel for movement, and hold both the subtle and more physical indications of your baby’s presence in your awareness at once.
  • Then, listen for any glimmers of what your baby is like without questioning or overthinking. I’ve personally found these early hints of personality ended up being true. 
  • As part of a journaling practice, write one sentence daily—a thought or feeling you want to share with your baby.
  • Lastly, send any messages to your baby or a general message of love.

It is important to note, the boundaries of consciousness are porous, so even if you are not carrying the child yourself, you can feel connection and experience communication just as strongly. The following are guided steps for connecting with your baby from afar. 

  • Close your eyes and bring awareness to your baby even if she is far away. 
  • See if you can feel from what direction she is related to where you are sitting even with your eyes closed. It may feel like slight warmth, light, or an intangible “aliveness.” 
  • Feel for any subtle reciprocation.
  • Sit with it in your simplest form of awareness.
  • Listen for any glimmers of what your baby is like without questioning or overthinking. 
  • Lastly, send any messages to your baby or a general message of love.
  • After your meditation, continue to hold that awareness of your baby. Talk with her in your mind and out loud. Rub your belly, or your partner’s if she is the one carrying. Consider your baby in your activities. Maybe go to a dance class so she can feel the movement. Or take her to a live music performance. When I traveled to London during one of my pregnancies, I felt like my daughter and I were taking our first trip together. I took her to a pipe organ concert at Westminster Abbey since she would be able to feel the low vibrations even in the womb.  
  • If you have a partner, or even older children, encourage them to connect to your baby as well. Invite them to talk into your belly. Or let them sit with you as you connect. You are already a family, and the bonds you form now will simply continue to grow and elaborate. 

For more on slowing down and tuning in during pregnancy, check out Tips for a More Mindful Pregnancy, Minimalist Pregnancy Essentials, and 10 Steps for Having a Feminist Pregnancy.

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