Mother Stories
Sophie Demenge Of Oeuf Shows Us Her Insanely Cool Family Home
Written by Katie Hintz-Zambrano
Photography by Photographed by Heather Moore
Feb 19, 2019
Before there was Instagram and a bazillion cool kiddie brands, there was Oeuf. Founded in 2003 by husband-and-wife team Sophie Demenge and Michael Ryan as a response to the lack of chic and modern children’s furniture for their first child, Oeuf (pronounced oof and meaning “egg” in French) is still going strong a decade and a half later, and now includes a supremely covetable array of children’s clothing and accessories, cheeky home textiles, and playful furnishings. As bonafide O.G.’s of the hip kids’ world in the U.S. (and the eco-friendly kids’ industry), perhaps it’s no surprise that the Brooklyn-based home of Demenge and Ryan and their children—Mae, 17, and Marius, 14—is also incredibly original (to note: there’s a trapeze in the living room and an entryway placard reminding all to “make today your bitch”). Follow along as the matriarch of the family gives us an inspiring tour of the eclectic space, whiling discussing her heartfelt approach to raising teens, how her French upbringing inspires her own parenting, decorating to “spark joy,” and running a pioneering family business.
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- “We moved to Park Slope, Brooklyn from the East Village in the summer of 2003 when our daughter Mae was 1 1/2 years old. Convinced there was no life outside of Manhattan, it took a few years of my husband’s persuading to take the leap. With no savings and our company, Oeuf, in its infancy, it wasn’t until 2010 that we were in a position to consider buying a home.”
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- The lady of the house, and also our tour guide.
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- “We began passively looking for a house in the Park Slope neighborhood, but were constantly discouraged by the asking prices. For several months I noticed a ‘for sale’ sign on a particular house that seemed perfect for us. Curious why it had been on the market for so long, I called the broker to make an appointment to see it. We found that the place was being used as an unofficial SRO, with bedrooms being rented out individually and kitchens and bathrooms for common use. Needless to say, the house didn’t present well. With the lingering effect of the 2008 financial crisis and the general rundown condition of the house, we saw an opportunity other didn’t.”
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- One of the seemingly hundreds of pieces of artwork that fill the space.
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- Why yes, that is a LaCroix pillow (by Oeuf!).
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- “It’s very eclectic and informal. We usually bring back the most impractical but curious things from trips we take. Masks from Latin America, a gondola oar lock from Venice, textiles from Southeast Asia, and Sri Lankan processional pieces, to name a few. To channel my inner Marie Kondo, most everything in the house sparks joy, makes me laugh or smile, warms my heart, or serves us in some way.”
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- “Our family portraits I commission from artist friends. I’m thinking of having all our faces as a piñata for next year! The Time magazine covers are also very special. Actually, not so much the covers, even though they're really cool, but the letters my mother sent to all those personalities and the letters she received back. I’m in awe of her self confidence or lack of self awareness and genuinely sharing bits of her everyday life or her dreams. The kindness of the responses is touching. Like JFK saying that ‘Yes, siblings can be annoying’ or Audrey Hepburn saying how lucky she is to have two cats. I cherish my daughter’s ceramics and a pillow she sewed for me years ago. My son’s love notes are on the wall by my desk. I re-read them all the time. They are like him, insightful and funny. In my last birthday letter he reassured me that for him I would always be 42! I have pictures of my maternal grandmother at all ages. From a little girl to an old lady. It gives me comfort to have pictures and drawings from people who have shaped me and the ones who shape me now.”
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- As a child, Sophie's mother sent letters to the stars on the cover of Time magazine, and got serveral responses and autographs in return.
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- “We like the auction experience. It’s super fun, especially Upstate NY. Some are in barns in the middle of nowhere. I love getting glimpses of different worlds. We’ve found treasures there like a church mahogany mirror and amateur oil painting portraits that I find quirky. There aren’t many Oeuf pieces in our home other than my son’s bed and his desk and a mini library in the living room. We do have furniture prototypes and samples lying around all the time. The alpaca goodies definitely spark joy and tenderness for me, as I know the hands behind them.”
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- “I love bathrooms! It’s a space where you usually start and end the day. It’s a place where I check in with myself. Showers are magical. I get a lot of ideas and breakthroughs in the shower. I like to burn essential oiIs so it smells like cardamon or sandalwood or bergamot. It’s a little sanctuary. It’s where I’m reminded to be grateful for this body of mine that I forget most of the time.” Ed Note: Flip ahead a few slides to get a look into Sophie's adorable bathroom.
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- “We were fortunate to have enough space that the kids’ stuff didn’t become overwhelming. Any rules we may have had were to serve the kids—not to placate our adult neurotic tendencies. Putting toys away or helping to clean up the kitchen after making cookies together was just something we do when living in a community (e.g. family). Now it’s taking the garbage out, emptying the dishwasher, taking care of the cat litter, etc.”
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- “We wanted to keep as many original details as possible. The only major renovation was on the parlor floor where we created an open floor plan and replaced the kitchen. Other than updating the bathrooms and a skim coating of the walls, we kept renovations to a minimum.”
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- Not your average kitchen decor.
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- “We are in a neighborhood that feels more like a village. The kids walk to school, we walk to the office. It’s very human scale. I don’t think that's what comes to mind when one thinks of raising kids in NYC. Where we are, it’s mostly houses, a big park, and great stoop life in the summer. The food co-op is a few blocks away. It reminds me of where I grew up in Paris.”
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- “I don’t know. I’m quite content in Brooklyn. But I would love to spend longer periods of time in France to have more quality time with my friends. I do miss my old friends and Paris.”
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- “I love the store Bird on Fifth Avenue in Park Slope. Beacon's Closet, a vintage clothing store, is my daughter’s favorite store. I do most of my exploring when I travel. I find exploring and play are really a state of mind, which comes easier to me when I’m away from my daily life. We have a little rustic cabin on a lake in the Catskills. As soon as it warms up, we go. We can’t go in the winter because it’s not winterized. I always forget how good it feels to be in nature.”
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- A cheeky daily reminder.
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- “To welcome and embrace challenges as they come. Those are incredible teaching opportunities and often push you out of your own comfort zone. Everyone learns. It doesn’t have to be dramatic. Trauma comes in all sizes and shapes in everyday life. I get excited to hold my children and listen as they try to unpack their feelings and process emotions in their own way. I’m very excited to watch them discover who they are and liking what they see and to trust they have the resources to overcome. They are learning to be discerning. And that too is very exciting. They know so much more than I did at their age…”
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- “Other than guns, consumerism, social media, global warming, social divisiveness, AI, racism, economic inequality, etc…nothing much.”
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- “My daughter is almost 17. She's spending the spring semester of her junior year on the Maine coast at a semester school where the focus is on the community, ecology, and history of the area. Besides school work, the students have responsibilities in the kitchen and chores at the school's own working farm. She’s most excited about doing a ‘solo’ in April where she will spend 2 nights and 3 days alone in nature with only a tarp for shelter and an adequate amount of provisions….yikes. My son is 14. He is the social butterfly and loves sports. He will be doing his first babysitting gig next week. He is super excited about that and making his own money.”
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- Inside Sophie's favorite room in the house—the bathroom.
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- Knickknacks everywhere.
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- “Mae is the anagram for Ame, which means ‘soul’ in French. She is an old one! The anagram was actually an afterthought but it’s very suiting. Michael and I had no doubt it was the name for her. In fact, we called her by her name while in utero. Her middle name is Liza, which was my mother’s first name. My son is Marius, an old French name (originally Latin) common in the South of France in the ‘30s and ‘40s. I’ve always loved that name. His middle name is Demenge, which is my last name. They both have my husband Michael’s last name, Ryan, which is Irish.”
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- “Yes, we couldn’t resist finding out. I didn’t really care, but I was a bit nervous to have a boy, having been raised with my sister by our mom and having been mostly surrounded by amazing women. Even our cousins were all girls except one boy, whom we barely saw. But my nervousness all melted away when we found out we were expecting a little boy and it was love at first sonogram. I take the responsibility of raising a man very seriously. Luckily, he has a great male role model in Michael and so does Mae. And I love that he has an older sister. I too have an older sister and she is my heart.”
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- “Always. I never really thought about it and I had no pressure, but it was completely obvious. And I can’t wait to be a grandmother.”
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- Inside the home office.
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- “I loved being pregnant, loved breastfeeding, co-sleeping. Schlepping them in the BabyBjorn until their feet would drag on the floor…”
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- “Different, not easier nor harder. It’s the same general lifelong parenting instinct and responsibility to protect, support, guide, and love your kids. But over the years it does evolve. It takes different shapes. It’s harder to protect your child physically, as they are more and more in the world spreading their wings. By then you hope you’ve instilled enough good sense to allow them to make responsible decisions—most of the time. Ideally, parents grow with their kids and their kids’ needs. It’s always changing. As soon as you start to relax into known territory, you're stretched to the edge of the unknown. I find myself doing a lot more active listening than talking these days.”
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- “We started Oeuf when expecting Mae, so yes it has influenced our path completely. We had a different business before. It was called R+D. We were doing furniture, ceramics, fiberglass, resin, metal…all kinds of things.”
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- “It’s all really intertwined. I mostly don’t feel like juggling because there are two of us and we are both hard workers. We support each other when one feels overwhelmed. I’m proud of what we have built from scratch. I have to remember that feeling more and pause and congratulate each other from time to time. Most of the time it’s really great working together. We do very different things and we really complement each other. Parenting always comes first.”
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- “There’s no question that my Parisian roots have influenced my parenting. But I can’t say exactly how. I’ve certainly benefited from both French and U.S. experiences.”
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- “I speak French with my kids. And my culture is surely incorporated in whatever I do, since it’s who I am. We go to France for several weeks during the summer.”
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- “Of course, often. I talk to my friends or Michael. Talking helps articulate and clarify the feeling and where it’s coming from and if it’s really my story today or some lingering old patterns.”
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- A glimpse into the master bedroom.
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- “Trust yourself and surround yourself with those who support you. With whom you can be real and vulnerable. It helps to have a sounding board. It’s a good time to favor the relationships that uplift and put some distance with the ones that deplete.”
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- “Be very mindful and thoughtful about managing the feelings and expectations of the first child. It’s hard to share your parents. There are ways to ease the transition. I got great tips from the psychoanalyst Francoise Dolto.”
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- “Simple, comfortable, low maintenance. I decided not to dye my hair when the white started to appear on the sides. It’s so liberating not to care even if it makes some of my French friends uncomfortable.”
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- A pile of fun pillows from Oeuf.
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- “I can’t say that motherhood hasn’t changed my style. It has changed with age. I care less so now than years before. I express myself differently. I do enjoy the creativity of other people’s styles and people-watching is one of my favorite things to do in New York.”
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- “I alternate between four jumpsuits and two pairs of jeans, a few alpaca sweaters, and this amazing knitted alpaca coat from Lauren Manoogian, which I basically live in. Plus, Ted Muehling earrings and a love bracelet that was a gift from my mother with a little message engraved.”
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- “Rachel Comey, Caron Callahan, Isabel Marant, No.6, and Ace + Jig.”
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- “I wash my face every night with Bioderma Micellar water—I’m so glad it’s available in drugstores in the U.S. now. And I use my cure-all cream from Weleda skin food on my hands and sometimes on my face if it’s dry, Weleda rose body wash, and Eau d’Hadrien from Annick Goutal that I have been wearing for years and years. For makeup—NARS blush stick, I especially like the one called Orgasm, perfect for rosy cheeks, organic sunscreen and moisturizer, and NARS concealer is great, too.”
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- “I enjoy retreats. I did a Vipassana last year (10-day silent retreat), which I would like to do every year. Michael is going in April. I do little 3-day ones here and there. I love Garrison and Kripalu. I do meditate. It helps with clarity. My attempts in working out invariably fail. One activity I do love is flying trapeze, especially with my daughter, Mae. I can’t stick with anything that feels like punishment.”
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- “I started a book club with my girlfriends. It’s been a couple of years now and have yet to choose a book, let alone read one! We mostly laugh at ourselves, which feels really good. Retreats on my own are great. I indulge in listening to podcasts and music.”
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- For more on Sophie and her work, check out Oeuf’s website and Instagram feed.
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