Mother Stories
At Home With Portland-Based Mother Of 2 Lindsay Meyer Harley
Written by Katie Hintz-Zambrano
Photography by Paige Jones
Sep 16, 2020
What a difference 18 days can make—especially in 2020. When we shot this profile on Darling Clementine and Still We Rise founder Lindsay Meyer Harley just two and a half weeks ago, the Portland-based mother of two, her family, and our photographer were still able to romp around outdoors, soaking in nature and capturing the beautiful Northern Pacific landscape as a backdrop. Now, due to the devastating wildfires ravaging the West Coast, Portland residents are doing anything but breathing easy, with their city currently ranking as the worst—in the world—in air quality and pollution.
But even before this turn of events, climate change—as well as family separation, systemic racism, getting folks to VOTE! VOTE! VOTE!, and so many other vital issues—have been top of mind for Lindsay. In our feature, the passionate and socially engaged entrepreneur—who has currently raised over $617,000 in 3 years for 18 incredible charities—discusses everything from small apartment living and being an expat kid to humbling oneself around “doing the work,” messing up publicly, and moving forward.
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- "We moved to Portland in 2015 and have been in our beautiful apartment in NE Portland ever since. It’s been a wonderful place to watch our children grow. I find it easier to parent in a smaller space, being able to see the kids easier, no worry of stairs and different levels has been wonderful, but we just closed on a home and are moving this fall to our very first house. We’ve been apartment dwellers since we met in 2003 in New York City, so this feels like a big move for us and we are very excited to lay down literal roots and make the home our own. We are moving a few blocks away from some close friends, which right now feels like the most amazing gift we could dream of."
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- "We like mid-century modern investment pieces mixed with lots of natural materials and fibers and personal touches, such as kids' artwork, souvenirs from travels, and family heirlooms. I try not to be too fussy about it, our home is well lived-in and we try to let each of our personalities show."
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- Rise & Shine print via Darling Clementine.
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"Our couch! It’s my favorite color and a huge upgrade from the grey one that we had for years before it. I don’t know why I thought couches had to be in a bland color to work. It fits our family of four without being on top of one another, finally."
Lindsay's couch is by Joybird.
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- Juliette wears shorts by Bobo Choses and cardigan by Summer and Storm, both from Darling Clementine.
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- "Your home should make you happy, and be filled with things that mean something to you. Also, you can never have enough plants."
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- Plant love, case in point.
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- "My husband's and my home office is on our dining room table, which is not ideal, but we’re making it work as best as possible. Needless to say, there’s a lot more dinners with the kids outside on the patio or in front of the TV in the meantime."
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- Lindsay wears a dress by Doen.
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- Pretty mugs and other special touches abound.
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- "The mix of city and country, that we can spend the day exploring farm lands and hiking, and then grab dinner downtown in the evening. I am a city girl at heart, but the past 5 years here has helped me see how restoring nature can be."
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"Yes! While we have no plans to move, there’s an entire world out there and growing up overseas has taught me that you’ll never really know a place like you do when you live there. You learn the culture in a different way than a tourist, shop at the local markets, learn the language, and become part of the landscape. Who knows what’s in the cards for us, but living somewhere new doesn’t scare me!"
Kawaiian Lion Peace Flag via Darling Clementine.
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- "Portland has been taking the pandemic seriously from the beginning and is still adhering to a very cautious approach. There’s a strong sense of community here and mask wearing has been done without argument since the beginning! We’ve been pretty much staying home with our kids and we have backyard and park hangs with friends from a safe distance, but that’s about it. I’m dreading winter and the isolation that will bring when we all head inside for the rainy season."
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- Art print by Justina Blakeney.
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- "All the bars and restaurants! I can’t wait to dine out at our favorite spots. Even more, I can’t wait to hang with friends again, hugging them deeply while sipping cocktails and food I didn’t have to cook myself. Before Covid, both my husband and I had weekly nights out with our friends and we both can’t wait to get back to that. Specifically, I can’t wait to visit favorite spots like Bar West, ¿Por Qué No?, Lovely Rita and Tope for cocktails and snacks and endless catching up in person with my favorite people."
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- Poster by Outlet PDX.
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- "Seeing who these little people grow up to be, where they go, and the impact they make on the world. That, and watching them learn something new. We are currently working on teaching Jack to read and it’s mind blowing watching it happen. How amazing are these little people!?"
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- "Watching the environment we’ve left to them get hotter, more polluted, and more dangerous. There’s a heavy guilt knowing they will have to deal with many more storms, wildfires, droughts, and so much more."
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- "Honestly, I haven’t really thought about it. It’s more their personalities I am excited to watch flourish. Though I am excited for when Juliette and I wear the same shoe size."
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- Here's To Strong Women print, via Darling Clementine, as well as books Here We Are by Oliver Jeffers and Home by Carson Ellis.
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- "Juliette just turned 11 earlier this month and is into all things art and dance. Since Covid began she’s been creating artwork all day every day, and when things get stressful or loud in our home, she heads outside with music in her headphones and dances on the patio. Jack, who’s 6, is into playing soccer and playing Animal Jam on his iPad."
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- "Juliette Rae is my oldest. Even though we had a few other name options for her, she was always Juliette, and Rae was something I looked up as I sought out a short middle name to balance out her hyphenated last name. Rae meant doe, a female deer, which was just so charming. My son is Jack Ezra. Jack was just always a classic name I loved. We didn’t have his middle name until after he was born and my mom suggested Ezra, which was my grandfather’s Hebrew name. The moment she said it it stuck."
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- "Yes, though I never really had a timetable for it. It happened how it happened without much planning."
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- Group Hug Print via Darling Clementine.
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- "I am tenderly strict, bending when needed, letting go of the rules when emotions run high and what’s needed more than rules is a hug, snuggle, or emotional connection."
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- "We just started distance learning after a 2-week 'soft start' to work out the tech quirks and help get the kids acclimated to it. We’ll see how it goes! This isn’t ideal for anyone involved, but I have such empathy for the teachers and grown-ups who are embarking on the unknown. The most important thing is that all these children feel safe, cared for, listened to, and there’s some normalcy in their daily lives. It helps knowing that all parents are in it together. I’m on some pretty hilarious and amazingly supportive parent text threads that are keeping me going."
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- "We have spent a lot of time working with our 11-year-old on organization skills, setting up calendars, having central documents with all relevant school info on it, things like that. I’ve also had to shift my work schedule to be able to help with Jack’s school schedule, as he’s only 6 and can’t read yet, so online school is a 100% parent participation experience. Luckily, I’m my own boss, and extremely flexible, ha! And I am able to work whenever works best for our family for the most part. The weekends end up looking more like work catch-up for me, so I can be available during the mornings to get him set-up with his Zooms and assignments."
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- "I grew up in a house filled with women, and a very patient father. We moved overseas to Hong Kong when I was in fifth grade and it was the best thing that happened to us, showing us the world beyond our backyard. My parents always valued travel over material things and those trips are with me today. Each memory, rather than things I would have grown out of, lost, or forgotten about."
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- Be The Love Generation print, and children's books, all via Darling Clementine.
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- "I want our children to grow up seeking the world out there, to understand that they aren’t the center of the universe, that families all over the world are doing just what they are—going to school, playing games in the park, and loving one another no matter where they are."
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- All Love Needs print via Darling Clementine.
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- "Both of our children know what’s going on in the world both politically and with Covid-19 at age-appropriate levels. To me, knowledge is power and I am willing to take on the hard task of explaining things to them beyond what’s on the news, to seek out appropriate books, articles, and shows that they can educate themselves with. I don’t think children automatically become old enough to one day just 'get it.' I’m in the camp that they should be brought up to understand what is happening and their place in it so that as they grow, it will shape how they approach life, work, relationships, etc. All that said, every family should do what feels right to them and I hold no judgement on those that go a different route."
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"Not really. I read a bunch while I was pregnant and after Juliette was born and read barely anything parenting related when Jack was born. I did, however, love Real Food for Mom and Baby by Nina Planck and have gifted it to many new mothers. I was also sent a copy of The First Forty Days: The Essential Art of Nourishing The New Mother and wish I had it after both of my children were born."
Embroidered hoop faces via Darling Clementine.
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- "Trust yourself, and don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. Your friends and loved ones are often waiting in the wings for that sign that their help is needed and will jump at the chance to be there for you. If I got a call from a new mama friend needing help, I’d be out the door before she hung up the phone ready to swoop in with a home cooked meal, a back rub, or just an ear to listen to—while snuggling that newborn, of course! We underestimate how much others want to help I think."
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- "My own mother and all the mom friends in my life. There is nothing more humbling and energizing than sitting amongst mothers and sharing it all, seeking advice, sharing stories, and just listening. It’s a magic community and I am honored to be part of it."
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- "I was born in NY, grew up in California until I was 10, then my family moved to Hong Kong where I was until I graduated high school—with one year in the middle of it all in Rome! I moved to New York City at 17 for college and was there until 2015, when we moved out west to Portland. While in NYC, I worked a handful of retail and bartending jobs before a stint in the world of online advertising. Then I started my own online shop, Darling Clementine, in 2011."
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- "Darling Clementine opened in 2011, when my daughter was 2. I wasn’t finding children’s boutiques around me or online that had things I wanted, or could afford, so I decided to start my own shop of well designed, sustainably made, and well curated items for children."
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- "I started Still We Rise in 2017 in response to this administration’s Muslim ban early in 45’s presidency. I watched in awe as lawyers flocked to the airports to offer their services for free and was moved to do something. I didn’t have the funds to send thousands to the ACLU, but I did have an idea how to gather the community. I reached out to every brand owner I knew through my shop and asked if they would be willing to donate items to a fundraiser, and every single one said yes. Our first fundraiser raised $12,000 and to date we just surpassed $617,000 raised for 18 amazing organizations doing the work, including Planned Parenthood, ACLU, Equal Justice Initiative, World Central Kitchen, and Southern Poverty Law Center. It’s a true labor of love and has been a light in the darkness of the past few years."
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- "I don’t do much planning for what to post, I don’t have social media calendars or anything like that. I post what I want when I am feeling it and if I am busy and can’t post, I simply don’t. I don’t feel beholden to sharing times for the most part, only if there’s something time sensitive I am sharing. I still enjoy the spontaneity of Instagram, and I enjoy feeds I can tell are less fussy, less structured, and more in real time. I also really enjoy the friendships I’ve made on the space and I love being able to connect directly with customers on my shop’s feed."
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- "I’ve always tried to have my business reflect my moral compass, from environmentally sustainable materials to supporting female-owned small businesses, and this year has pushed me further into that space to take on many more Black-owned businesses into the shop as long-term partners. It’s changed how I parent, too. Doing an audit of our bookshelves showed we needed to expand the main characters our children were seeing."
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"To give a little background, my children and I created a fundraiser in June of some hand-dyed tees that my kids wrote Black Lives Matter on. This was a 100% not-for-profit fundraiser for The Loveland Foundation (an amazing org you should all check out!). After we shipped all the tees, we had many requests for more, but in order to be able to keep paying my bills and keep the shop open we had to reduce the percent donated from 100% to 50%, in addition I gave my children $2.50 from each shirt they completed from the shop’s portion, not the donated 50%. While my intention was to raise money and awareness, I tripped over that intention and my impact was one of making money off of the trauma Black people are going through in this country. Obviously that was never my intention, but that doesn’t matter if the impact is different. This was pointed out to me publicly on Instagram by a few people and I right away felt myself retreat into defensiveness, but I stopped myself, reminding myself that I must sit with how I am feeling and use this moment to move forward in the right direction.
I took the night to think about it and woke up with a new perspective. I thanked those who took the time to reach out and promised to donate the entirety of the profits for this initiative. In all honesty, it was a really important wake-up call, that you can be 'doing the work,' reading the books, listening to the podcasts, and attending the marches and STILL MESS UP. It was a reminder that this journey is a forever climb, and that we mustn’t let a fall stop us from listening, changing our ways, and moving forward. I really appreciated that my followers expected more from me after years of working towards social justice via the shop, as well as my personal life. It said to me they’re listening, and that’s pretty amazing. My ultimate takeaway: it’s much easier to stay quiet as a business, sell your products, and stay out of it all, but to step in, use your voice and allow yourself to be vulnerable, to mess up, learn from it, and do better tomorrow is a lesson I want to keep learning myself, and one I want to model for my children."
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- "There are literally so many issues. My advice to those interested in activism is to seek out something they are passionate about. It’s much easier to fight with all you’ve got if you choose something that really matters to you. There are so many causes, so don’t get overwhelmed. Stick with things that speak to you. Right now I am focused on educating people about their voting rights, registering to vote, and the importance of showing up in November. I am volunteering with When We All Vote and encourage others to join this effort. It’s super easy and can be done at home, even with little ones around!"
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- "It informed it 100%, as there wasn’t a shop like mine when my daughter was born, so I created one. Now there are lots of shops, but I’ve been around longer than almost all of them."
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- "Figure out what restores you and schedule it into your week, every single week. For me it’s reading and spending time with friends. I don’t think of them as luxuries or things I should feel guilty doing. They make me a happier mom and wife and a better business owner. Women especially I find feel guilty doing things that are for them. I think that is heartbreaking but totally relatable. Women are so many things to so many people and if they aren’t restoring themselves they will break at some point. I hope those reading this will release some of that guilt and enjoy your time. You come back a better version of yourself and your family needs that too."
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- "A modern take on Little House on the Prairie, with a little '70s hippie thrown in. I like easy-to- toss-on clothes that I don’t have to fuss over. I invest in things I love that I know will last, too. No more one-season buys for me."
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- "It has changed. However, I have been a mother for 11 years. So, perhaps the changes are also coming with age."
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- "Since I work from home and always have—pre-Covid, too!—comfy loungewear is key. I like to curl up with my laptop in pieces from Nico Nico, sweatpants from Free & Easy, and basics from Target. My staples when I’m not working or stuck at home include flowy long dresses from Doen, pops of color from Ace & Jig, linen dresses from Rachel Pally, and chunky knits and high-waisted wide-leg denim."
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- Lindsay wears a dress by Doen, and jewelry from Ariel Gordon and Seaworthy. Juliette wears a top and shorts by Nico Nico from Darling Clementine and Saltwater sandals. Jack wears a terrycloth top and shorts set by Summer and Storm from Darling Clementine and Vans slip-ons.
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- "I wash my face with Allafia’s Everyday Coconut fair trade face cleanser, then I use Mee Ra Rituals Hydrating Emulsion Spray before adding some light coverage. I just started using Iris & Romeo’s dewy coverage and it’s amazing! If I want a little more of a sun-kissed color, I add a drop of Drunk Elephant’s D-Bronzi into it. On the weekends I try to fit a face mask in. My favorite is Wildcare’s Bee Rosy, and for nighttime I’ve been using Kana’s Lavender Hemp Sleeping Mask, it smells soooo good! Some other staples are Mother Mountain Naturals from Midland Shop. I love the Cactus Serum for light moisture. I let my hair air dry while scrunching in some Kristin Ess Curl Defining Creme to tamp down the frizz and soften my waves. And if I’m going out with my husband on a date night or out with my girlfriends, I’ll add Le Labo’s Bergamote 22 Eau de Parfum and Wato’s Beni Balm, which has a hint of color."
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- "I love going for walks when I need to recharge, listening to music or a podcast, or calling a friend for a catch up."
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- "Me time is either sneaking away with a book, or hanging with girlfriends. Now more than ever, a backyard hangout with friends lifts me in ways that are beyond measure. I come home floating."
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- "I am absolutely loving Braided Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer. It is the balm my weary soul needs. Everyone needs this beautiful book by their bedside."
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- "Setting up house! We are doing some remodeling and have never done anything like this before, so we are excited. And a little nervous. You can follow along on my IG where I’ll share the process."
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- For more on Lindsay, her businesses, and her activism, be sure to follow @lindsaymeyerharley, @_stillwerise, and @shopdarlingclementine on Instagram.
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Lindsay’s bare feet are lovely! I love the tone of her gorgeous soles in the picture at the top of the page.