Amanda Chantal Bacon-Photos and Interview

“We have been here in Rustic Canyon for four years. It was my dream neighborhood and one of the neighborhoods that, when Rohan was a baby, I would drive around to get him to nap during the day. I'd always drive through and look around and wish that one day we could move here. There's beautiful homes, beautiful trees, lots of Eucalyptus in the neighborhood. It really has a unique feel for Southern California. It feels more like Northern California. My dream was always that my children could walk down to the park themselves and play, have a little freedom. There are birds and owls and it's pretty magical.”

“When I first got pregnant, we emptied the contents of our home, so we have started over in a way, and made choices together. We both love organic materials and clean, simple forms. And then all of that is spiked with all these spiritual psychedelic relics and tokens from our travels. It's been a joy making a family home together.”

“Yes, within the last four years, there have been seemingly endless projects. Our most recent has been a third-trimester decision to go into some major demo and repair that's really down to the wire—were still going, and technically baby could safely come at home any time now.”

"We're pretty minimal when it comes to babies. Rohan was born with just a Moses basket. And as he progressed and moved out of my bed and moved into his room, things grew organically that way. I’m usually so minimal, but it’s a little different with this baby. Organization is a focus after having the opposite experience. I want to protect my marriage, my physical health. and sanity, in a way I didn't know to prepare for last time. With that intention in mind and a desire for a little bit more structure, more stuff has arrived. I fell in love with this site, Maisonette, and they've got a great edit of all the things in one place. That was extremely helpful since I was making the nursery from bed after work. A lot has changed in baby-gear-land since I had my son, almost 8 years ago, but one thing that has remained is my love of Ouef. We went for the whole thing: a crib, dresser, shelving—it was really exciting to get all of those boxes at once and make a room. I never did that with Rohan. We basically co-bunked until my husband moved in! The nursery makes me feel like I'm going to be way more organized this time around...we'll see!"

“Different—each pregnancy and each child really is its own journey. I was constantly sick and nauseous for the first trimester, more so with this one than with Rohan. But my second trimester was just a completely blissful experience, which was completely unique to this pregnancy. I felt like I was in a state of, like eyes-open meditation, constant bliss. I felt way more patient and compassionate and connected to nature and to my heart and to the baby. That was really wonderful. Now during this third trimester I got bronchitis that became asthmatic, and I was really sick. And I was still working and traveling and getting on airplanes for work for more than two months. That was a struggle. While pregnant, you don't have the same capacity to heal and bounce back. But I eventually did, and I am now in the last weeks. I'm feeling pretty great now—calm, happy, able to focus. I attribute this to going back to acupuncture once a week. At the end of those sick months, I started to feel really down and tired and anxious. It took one session of needles for me to bust out of it. I'm so grateful for acupuncture, especially while pregnant."

“Mentally, emotionally it’s definitely a different experience from my first pregnancy. Obviously, having a husband this time makes a huge difference. Being in a secure, supportive, loving, happy relationship and having a partner who's connected to the whole process, from conception through all the twists and turns of the pregnancy—to have this experience and feel safe and loved and supported feels like the greatest gift of my life. It's healing on levels I didn’t know it would touch. Some of the same physical ailments can come up and some of the hormonal shifts, but I'm held and that makes for such a different experience. So, I have a lot of compassion for anyone who is not feeling safe or having their needs met. That could be somebody who's single and pregnant, that could be somebody who is in a marriage that is typically strong and good, but their partner is not connecting and resonating with the birth process. I think there's a lot of ways that can come up. It's night and day.”

“I was concerned, one, because I'm 35 and biologically that is that’s the number everyone likes to talk about it—you’re 'geriatric.' And I work with a lot of people and know a lot of people that have not had an easy time getting pregnant, and it’s not just people past 35, that includes women in their late 20s. It's a documented medical phenomenon that fertility rates are going down. So, I went in eyes wide open, and knew that would potentially be part of our journey. We waited until our wedding night to officially start trying to get pregnant. So, there was a year of excitement around getting pregnant and really holding that date in the calendar.”

“In the year leading up to our wedding night, I was working with an acupuncturist, prepping my body and working on egg health. My husband and I were both really excited about sperm and egg health in the same way that I'm really excited about hormone health—I nerd out on that stuff. Preconception was an exciting opportunity for us to both to get on board and take different supplements and go to acupuncture weekly. My endocrine system is something that I am always working on, and I am at an age where egg health is typically declining. But I really do look at age as being biological rather than chronological. I am more fertile now and read younger from a blood and hormone panel on paper now than I did eight years ago. We ended up getting pregnant with the fourth or the fifth cycle. I think it was five months, but one of those months I was on a business trip so we missed our window."

"I don't have a GP, so with this last bout of bronchitis, it was like, oh my God, wait, I don't have a doctor! I'm going to have to find a doctor. When there is something that I truly feel concerned about, I'll just dive deep and go find a specialist. Having done work on the autoimmune and endocrine system, and on hormonal stuff for the last 15 years, I would say I have an advisory board—people that I work with. And so really, I can reach out to someone who is a genius at looking at blood hormone panels and he’ll pull very specific tests, and I can get on the phone with him and we can discuss all of that. Then I have an acupuncturist who's working with herbs and needles and we're dialing in to that system, and also a kinesiologist, who can open up energetic channels in my body. So I went at it from many different angles, but these are people that I've been working with for more than 10 years and that are on my roster already. And it's normal maintenance stuff. I just let them all know I was trying to gear up to get pregnant, so we took a different approach. But for someone who maybe just has a GP and is looking to optimize, or if you're trying and it's not happening, I think that acupuncture is an incredible way to start. I also think that blood hormone panels can arm you with really good concrete information. And that info can then help your acupuncturist with treatment. I actually think that's more effective in many general cases then going to see a fertility specialist. Stress, chemistry in the body, ridding the body of inflammation, addressing any hormonal issues, really looking at gut function—I think all of those are the things you should look at first, rather than just going straight to ‘let's go really invasive and jack you up on hormones.’ There's certainly a time and a place for that. But start by looking at the whole body.”

“My first trimester I was really sick and nauseous, but I also constantly needed to be eating. But a lot of my regular food seemed disgusting to me, so I was basically eating kids’ food. But it would go in waves—like if something would work for me for three days, like garbanzo mac and cheese, I would eat that five times a day for a few days, and then that would be disgusting, and I'd have to move on to the next thing. What I eventually found was that the more protein I ate, the less nauseous I would be. So, I ate way more eggs than I've ever eaten in my life, and massive amounts of yogurt and goat kefir. I really don't typically eat dairy, but for a while I was just living on butter, eggs, dairy, and toast. So, that was not typical. I truly didn't want to eat vegetables—I didn't really want to look at a vegetable, and then second trimester, around week 16, everything normalized. That’s when the clouds parted and I could see the sun again. I was so happy to eat salads and soups!”

“I typically have a sweet tooth that I'm always battling. But during pregnancy, I've had no type of sweet tooth. I just crash if I don't have protein every few hours. But the second trimester was a little more forgiving and I got more creative and started incorporating nuts and nut butters and beans. Bone broth was really helpful—I added it to everything. And I definitely eat more now than I've ever eaten—I eat more often and I consume more. I was wondering if I was going to need to be concerned about weight gain in the beginning, because by the time the first trimester was rounding out, I gained 20 pounds and I just started to do the math...I gained around 40 pounds in the end. And there are all these terrible pregnancy guides and apps that tell you how much weight you should have gained by now—but everybody's different. Everybody gains weight differently. Like how can these rules apply? But yet I'm still on the app every week. So, I was definitely a little concerned, like, wow, I'm only supposed to gain 25 pounds? I think it's really strange that there is a number out there that is supposed to apply to all women everywhere, of all shapes and sizes. It just doesn't make sense to me. But for me it has definitely leveled out, and I think my body just needed to pack on 20 pounds fast in order to keep the baby and keep the machine going.”

“I’m working with my dream midwife, I love her so much! She is everything that I would ever want from a midwife. I started reading Ina May Gaskin's books in high school and knowing, as a teenager, that was my path. And I didn't have that experience with my first. But this time around I really have found the right person. I'm in a different place. I can advocate for myself in a different way. Your life and the people around you are such a reflection of where you're at. Right now I have a really present, incredible partner, and my dream midwife, and a great work team around me, which allows me to feel really good and supported at work, as well. With Rohan, I was just opening Moon Juice, so there was no team. I was just winging it.”

"My midwife, Davi Khalsa, who has been doing it for a long time and is an angel. And I have a really great back-up OB, which again, is a difference with my first pregnancy. Last time I was so committed to having a fearless homebirth, that it really didn't have a backup plan in place. And this time around I have a wonderful OB that I've seen for a while, since before the pregnancy, and he works so well with my midwife, and they've got like a 30-year relationship. So, just as a team, if anything does arise, I feel so safe. Teamwork is so important. I would never want to be in a situation where, you know, there is a transfer, there's an emergency, and my backup doctor and midwife are not on the same page. I don’t have a doula. I may decide like a week before the birth that I want one. That decision will be made at some point in the next couple of weeks. I may decide at like a week before the birth that I want someone there, and I'm so lucky to have friends ready to come if I need it. But I’m feeling really good about bringing this baby out the way she came in: with just my husbands love. In my first pregnancy I was so eager to explore the birth world and, you know, not having a partnership I felt aligned in, it was really important that I had a doula to support me. But this time I haven't been feeling the need for any extra emotional support. And when I labor I'm pretty happy with going inside and having more of an internal experience.”

"Oh my God. My first birth was not an orgasmic birth. I had days of back labor. Unmedicated back labor is not a joke. So, fingers crossed that doesn't happen again. I don’t have an attachment to a particular story. I'm open to a painless, blissful birth, that there is such a thing as an orgasmic birth—that it's in the realm of possibilities, and it happens to people out there, and that I may be one of those people that gets to experience it. I also have been one of those people that has experienced a physically and emotionally tough birth. And I got through that as well. It's really big work and there's no two ways about it, you just do it. There's surrender and resolve, knowing that the birth is going to be what it will be. I will be surrounded by skilled people, but ultimately, there's no amount of preparation—prenatal Yoga, postpartum prep, aroma therapy—or any technique during birth to get you out of what you need to do. I just need to be really present and walk through it. In a way, having a tough first birth has helped me surrender and be okay with the fact that it's going to be what it's going to be, and we’ll get through it."

"I do believe that the 40-day postpartum period should be honored. That when you support your body in this restorative process, not only do you feel better about eventually bouncing back to some type of work and life, but you’ll feel that support three years postpartum, and even when menopause starts to hit. The theory is that if you honor these 40 days, not only can you heal your birth, but you can heal deeper imbalances in the body, and that it will protect you during menopausal shifts that come later in life. So, my plan is really not venturing far from the bed for 40 days."

"I have somebody that will come to the house to do acupuncture during the first 40 days, I’ll be on a TCM herbal regime, I plan on giving myself quick, warm-oil massages and making sure that somebody is there to hold the baby so that I get in the shower. I know that there is a growing industry of postpartum food delivery services—there's a great one in L.A. —but I plan to cobble it together myself. We'll see if that goes down in burning flames. If so, I will certainly call a postpartum food delivery person. But I also feel confident in asking family and using Postmates— a mix of tech and some neighborly love to get the right food in the house. I actually really enjoy cooking for myself, and I'm pretty particular. So I feel good about that. I have supplements and adaptogens that I'll definitely be on. Encapsulating my placenta was really helpful for me last time around, so I'll be doing that again. I know going into it that, when the milk comes in and those hormones begin to really drop and change to accommodate a new phase, that I am going to feel the roller coaster. I'm happy to accept that in advance and really look at it as a biological situation to navigate, rather than not have information and instead creating stories about what's happening and putting those feelings onto anything external. I'm just really clear about the drops, so eating foods that are going to be helpful, staying warm, having an acupuncturist come to me, and being very communicative to my partner and my care providers is incredibly important."

"For new mamas—do not try to entertain anyone. You shouldn’t even have to try to act normal. Certainly don't put yourself in any position in those first 40 days where you're going to be called upon to look normal, sound normal. You're in a different phase."

“Yes. I really wanted a girl because I could feel her, we could feel a girl out there pulling on us. She showed up in dreams and meditations and communicated with us. I don't think the preference comes from, 'I have a boy and I want a girl'—it's really that she’s had direct communications with both of us. We fell in love with her before she dropped in.”

“We do. My husband was on tour in Europe a few summers before she showed up. It was before we were married he dreamt of her name, and she repeated the name to him five times, so he wouldn't forget when he woke up. And he called me when he woke up and he told me and I knew exactly what the name meant—it really did come from somewhere else, and she got through to us.”

“He's been so excited. I think he's old enough to be really cognizant of what is happening and that she's coming. And he becomes more and more interested in his independence and manhood, he's been really involved with the pregnancy and has been to midwife appointments and gone to OB appointments when we've done some anatomy scans and he’s seen her. He'll come and talk to her and put his hand on her. All this weekend she was really active and he kept going up to the belly and talking and putting his hand on her and she kept on moving for him. She and her brother already have a thing happening. We'll see what happens with the birth. I may get feelings that are coming through early enough in the day that he can go have a sleepover with a friend. Or it may happen fast and in the middle of the night and he wakes up to a baby or he may be right there for it—I just don't know.”

“It's been incredible. Rohan has actually known his step dad since he was a few months old and they could not love each other more. We are all so lucky that they genuinely enjoy each other as people, I don't take it for granted, it didn’t have to go that way. My husband is an incredible father and teacher. In many ways, he’s showing me how to be a better parent, inherently he's an incredible dad. In the way he shows up, in his patience, the way that he can lovingly create boundaries and bring consistency to our family—it's a beautiful masculine quality and I was not mastering it on my own. He brought a lot of beautiful masculinity s that our tiny family of two really needed, and Rohan and can see that and is even able to express gratitude for it. Rohan will just say how much he loves him—he calls him Greggy–how much he loves Greggy, and how much better our lives are now that Greg is with us. It's really, really sweet”

“His father is definitely involved and a part of his life. And Rohan loves his dad, as well. Sadly, I have not been able to co-parent with his dad in a way that I would have hoped for. Certainly for Rohan’s sake. Unfortunately, that has not happened. It's something that I wish were different, but it's not. So, we all do our best and I'm just so happy to see that Rohan is thriving and happy.”

“It pushes me to stay awake and to continue to evolve.”

“Ultimately death. Any concern in parenting very quickly and ultimately can be whittled down to, well, death.”

“The mom guilt comes in when I have been reactive with my child. This is really something I aim to avoid. When I have been and I feel a pang of regret, I go to him and I apologize and explain exactly why I’m sorry and how I wish I could have been better. He is always responsive, quick to clear and move forward.”

“My own upbringing was very different from my family now. I struggled with my own upbringing. And I think there were a lot of differences between the household I was raised in and the household that I make now. And so that is definitely a point of inspiration—how can I move with more love and compassion and happiness than I grew up with? How can I not punish or isolate my children in ways that were more common previously?”

“I think I just wing it. But I did enjoy Spiritual Midwifery, The Fourth Trimester, and Magical Child."

“It's certainly highlighted for me the importance of bringing more stories of feminine strength and the feminine narrative, and not taking that for granted and really consciously making that part of our home’s curriculum.”

"Oh, gosh. I feel like there’s so much advice flying around before you're about to give birth to your first child. And not a lot of it sticks. Maybe you hear it in hindsight. But I guess I would say worry less about the material industry of birth and motherhood. You don't really need any of those things. Except maybe a car seat. Don't concern yourself with that, and find joy in stumbling around and figuring it out. You don't need the accouterments.”

“You can do it. Logistically, it may seem daunting, but there's nothing more important than feeling like you are in the right flow in your life. And if a partnership is not serving you in the right way, it is not serving your child. And it certainly won't serve you as a parent. So, anything that feels logistically daunting, try to have faith. You being whole on your own is actually the most important thing. Whether you're in a partnership or you're exiting a partnership or you're not in a partnership, it's evermore important as a parent to make sure that you are strong and healthy and happy and whole in yourself. There isn't a time and a place where it’s more important for you to ruthlessly do what it takes to get yourself to that place. Do whatever it takes.”

"I love the beach and the trees and the abundance of healthy food here in the sunshine. To eat we love Gjusta, Shima, and Moon Juice. We love to go to the Eames House and Getty Museum. For shopping, Tortoise, General Store, and Farmshop are favorites."

“Yes. Happily. I hope that we get to live many, many more places.”

"Machine washable or bust is my mantra. Staples are good jeans, flat boots, a cardigan, a perfect bra, a few good white t-shirts and a couple of dresses. Some of my favorites are Levi's, Doen, Pretties, Agent Provocateur, Hatch, Ozma, and Agnes Badoo."

"My regular products are SuperYou, SuperHair, Exfoliating Acid Potion, Plumping Jelly Serum, Vegan Collagen Protection, hair oil, brow serum, and a check/lip tint. Equally as important are meditation, walking, eight hours of sleep, endermologie, a low glycemic/high fat diet, a healthy love life, acupuncture, and kinesiology."

“I’ve let the fantasy of balance go. You can’t do everything every day. Some days I can really dig in and make meaningful progress with work, and some days I can be one hundred percent present with my child. Some days I shine at expressing how much I love my husband and how grateful I am for him and on other less frequent days I get to tune in deeply and laugh with a friend. On a good day I get to nail 2 of these things. I keep the balls in the air and make sure that work, my child, and my husband are deeply loved in a week.”

“I’ve been realizing more and more that my biggest life goal is to have adult children that still want to spend time with my husband and I. Family vacations that include laughing and hugging when my children are in their twenties is the vision I have been holding. I really try to let that inform how I relate to these little ones now. That doesn’t mean avoiding discipline, but rather always coming from a place of love and respect.”

For more on Amanda, be sure to follow her and Moon Juice on Instagram.

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